5 Ways to Keep the Fire Ignited in Your Relationship

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5 Ways to Keep the Fire Ignited in Your Relationship

Divorce Is Not An Option!

These days divorce is a pretty common occurrence, maybe even more so than a marriage actually lasting till death do you part.

“Irreconcilable differences” is usually asserted as the underlying reason for divorce, and that largely is because people allow themselves to grow apart.

When my husband and I got married we made a pact: divorce is not an option.


To avoid the growing apart mishap, we’ve started doing a few things to keep the fire alive and burning in our marriage:

Workout Together

no divorce when you workout together

Getting sweaty together can keep you together

There’s something inherently sexy about getting sweaty together.

Feeling annoyed with your spouse?

  • Run sprints together.

You’ll be out of breath and riding an endorphin high by the end of it, and you probably will find that you care less about whatever argument was bothering you beforehand. Even if you don’t do the same workout as your spouse, just hit the gym together to break a sweat and get your blood pumping!

You’ll both leave feeling accomplished, and you can enjoy those good mood enhancing endorphins together.


Knock Something Off Each Of Your Bucket Lists

bring excitement to stave off divorce

Wow! That’s an amazing way to enjoy each other’s wish list

For my birthday this past year my husband surprised me by taking me skydiving, something that has long been on my bucket list

… and most definitely not on his.

However in an effort to share an experience with me he swallowed his fear of jumping out of an airplane and went anyway.

We had a blast!

This selfless act on his part that allowed me to do something I’d always wanted to do made me love him even more.


Make Date Night A Priority

candlelight dinner on date night

The magic of togetherness can be a simple and regular night out

Once a month we go on a date night.

There are a few rules to our date nights: we switch off who picks what we’re doing each month, no cellphones are allowed at the table, and it has to be something we’ve never done before.

This way we get to explore new places in the city we live in, we have an entire night dedicated to just the two of us, and we don’t allow ourselves to be distracted by technology.

It’s so easy to get caught up in everyday life and then wake up one morning and realize that you haven’t had a meaningful conversation with your spouse in weeks; this helps carve out at least one night a month where you do.


Take Weekend Getaways

Weekend getaways for couples for growing togetherness

Time out
Togetherness ON!!

Maybe regular vacations aren’t an option.

But even just getting out of town together for a weekend every couple months is a great way to reconnect with each other and do something fun together.

And marriage should be fun!

Go to a winery, visit a new town, or go to the beach for the weekend; just do something together and savor the time spent with the person who fulfills the role of both lover and best friend in your life.


Hold Hands

touch is a powerful force to remain together

Touch. It brings out the very best in us

We’ve all seen and adored those old couples who are still holding hands, and marveled over how they’ve stayed in love for so long.

One of the reasons?

Discover the secrets in getting your ex back in your life

They’re still touching!

Touch, even in the form of hand holding or an arm around the shoulders, shows that you’re still interested in your spouse, and gives off an aura of love.

Regularly engaging in these seemingly small embraces can help keep that ember glowing.


Put In The Work

Obviously divorce is unavoidable in some instances; but not all of them.

Marriage takes a lot of work; however it should still be a fun adventure that you share with your spouse.

Keep stoking the fire of your marriage to keep it burning.


Over To You

Now that we’ve reached the bottom, here’s what you can do next:

  • Which of these do you need to start doing?
  • That’s Five. What’s another one you’re doing?
  • Click one of the Share buttons – your friends can then enjoy this article too.

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Avatar of Nancy

Nancy was a professional nanny and she loves to write about wide range of subjects like health, Parenting, Child Care, Babysitting, nanny background check tips etc.

Nancy – who has written posts on GeekandJock.


  1. wrote on June 27th, 2013 at 6:33 pm


    Have you noticed that even if something in your life is not going well, when your relationships are good, you feel better and more complete in the world? When your relationships are good, your life is good. The great news is that you control 2 powerful relationship skills- your attitude and your intentions.

  2. wrote on May 2nd, 2013 at 11:12 am


    I hate divorce. Divorce should be last & final option if any other option not available.

    When there is any problem, we need to remember our past romantic day. It will give us strength to be better again. We can also pass a week in a forest or lake side which helps us to make our mind cheerful.

    I just love the points what Nancy said :)
    Ahsan recently posted..How To Secure Your Google PasswordMy Profile

    • Avatar of Martin
      wrote on May 2nd, 2013 at 12:45 pm


      Too true, Ahsan. Though people start divorcing because they themselves determine that there isn’t any other option left to them to persue. It’s easy to say that there should be but that’s our viewpoint, from the outside looking in.
      With posts like this to further educate our readers, it’s hoped those relationship ‘fires’ get sparked and keep things burning for the good of all concerned – then there’s no need to consider divorce as things are happy, passionate and rocking on!
      Do you know people who have gone through divorce because of a lack of passion?
      Martin recently posted..Searching For “The One”?My Profile

  3. wrote on October 29th, 2012 at 2:42 pm


    Thanks Nancy, these are fresh ideas. Never thought about knocking something off the ole bucket list as a team. And simple yet they often overlooked, like holding hands
    Mike recently posted..Kindergarten CopMy Profile

    • Avatar of Martin
      wrote on October 30th, 2012 at 8:20 am


      That was something I got from the post too, Mike.
      While I love holding hands with Pam, it’s thinking of other ideas that are ‘outside the usual box’, like the bucket list concept that bring new freshness to your relationship.
      Now to chat about that bucket list with her :)

  4. wrote on July 21st, 2012 at 4:04 pm

    Mariella Lombardi

    you’re so right…it is so easy to forget what you promised each other when lots of fighting is going on. I do believe a divorce can be avoided but not for everybody and people can’t always stay together.
    As for Nancy’s advice, it is really useful to do those things indeed. I think another advice would be to do everything naturally and stop trying to hard, just be patient. Everybody goes through some rough patches eventually and people need to be mature about it.
    Mariella Lombardi recently posted..My Daughter is Overweight – How Do I Tell Her Without Crushing HerMy Profile

    • Avatar of Martin
      wrote on July 22nd, 2012 at 12:59 pm


      Patience is a good tip too, Mariella.
      Well, I can chalk up a divorce in the past so, for some situations, that can certainly be the better option. But it’s when you gain a new mindset around what your partner means to you that ‘divorce isn’t an option’ takes on a new meaning, I think. You learn a new understanding and want it to work – there’s a difference there somewhere.

      Agree that everyone does go through rough patches – often that can be the beginning to the end instead of the start of a new beginning.

      Martin recently posted..WPHypnolinks – The Review, The Secrets and The Inside ScoopMy Profile

  5. wrote on July 21st, 2012 at 12:52 am

    Nancy Shields

    Sorry about that – I saw that Nancy wrote this – great writing Nancy!

  6. wrote on July 21st, 2012 at 12:52 am

    Nancy Shields

    Great tips my friend but the most important of the tips is what you and your beautiful wife committed to each other upon entering this sacred union: Divorce is not an option……



    • Avatar of Martin
      wrote on July 21st, 2012 at 8:39 am


      Speaking from personal experience, Nancy, it’s sometimes challenging to remember about the sacred union when you’re in the middle of a relationship war zone :)
      Putting Nancy’s tips into action and making them a natural part of your magical partnership will tend to keep the thought of why you got together in the first place, firmly in mind.

      One of thos ‘a means to an end’ things. Agree that divorce is not an option though. Love your visits here, Nancy too.
      Martin recently posted..Love – I’ll Keep Coming Back For MoreMy Profile

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