help?

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  • Sara
    Post count: 0
    #7925 |

    So my boyfriend and I have been together for a little over 2 months. We started out being 45 minutes away and after one month of being together I had to move 7 hours away. While we were still relatively in the same place we saw each other every weekend. We would text all day long, everyday. There would be long paragraphs of texts about how happy we were and how much we liked each other, stuff like that. We never talked on the phone, because since we were able to see each other every weekend texting was enough to get us by. Now we still don't talk on the phone. We don't text as much as we did either. He works during the day, so I usually think nothing of that, but when he gets off it still takes him hours to text back. It will take us a whole day to have one conversation….usually about how the other is doing. We don't really talk about much of anything. He refuses to call me on the phone. He says that guys don't like to talk on the phone all the time. I had to threaten to break up with him just to get a few minutes of phone time. He doesn't have a computer at home he can use to skype with so its been really hard. Sometimes it feels like the distance doesn't get to him as much as it gets to me. So I guess my question is….how do I deal with all of this? Is it true that guys just don't like to talk on the phone….ever, or is he just making excuses? I just need some advise. Please and thank you! :)

  • Martin
    Keymaster
    Post count: 250

    Hey Sara.

    All guys are different, thankfully, otherwise the world would be pretty boring.

    So it is true that some people dislike the phone and some others can yabber on for hours. Your guy might be one of those that dislike the phone.

    Though might I suggest you ask for his opinion on ‘Hey babe, what are some of your thoughts and ideas on how we could better have some decent conversations? I'm feeling a little isolated without hearing your voice and it gets to me sometimes. What do you think?'

    What his reply to that is, might give us all a better idea on what he's thinking and the approach to take next.

  • Mike
    Post count: 0

    I second that notion… I don't like talking on the phone either, but it has nothing to do with my feelings toward who's on the other end, so I wouldn't be insecure about that.
    You might like to try to get his attention with positive texts rather than negative like threatening to break up. Such as being creative about what he might feel compelled to respond to, or trying sexy messages… I've never done long distance before, I imagine it must be hard.

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