should I or shouldn't I?

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  • Profile photo of AnonymousUserAnonymousUser
    Participant
    Post count: 19
    #2365 |

    I have been in a “new” relationship for a little over a month. It started out fun….texting wars, silly comments, then visits to one anothers' homes. We get along, but our temperaments are different. He is impatient and can be tempermental, but gets over it rather quickly. I tend to brood. Wednesday, it was the usual–silly texts back and forth from work, etc.

    Thursday, hardly anything, then when I asked what was wrong, I got a text saying “its not like I have time every 30 minutes” and “you constantly need attention where as I do not” and the last comment was “its different if we need to talk about something but the rest is BS.” Whaaaa??? Where did that come from? HE was the one perpetuating all the silly texts prior to that! I was very hurt. I don't “need attention” and I had NO idea he had been busy. The next morning, he sent a silly good morning text, we went back and forth a bit, then later on in the morning he mentioned that he was sick of his job and didn't want to be there.
    That evening, I got some troubling news from home regarding my dad. Unfortunately I started drinking (bad call) and then I also decided to go to his house (another bad call.) He was laying on the couch with a nasty headache. He said hi with a smile when I came in, but then got really, really crabby….and to make a long story short, he ended up yelling that he just wanted to be left alone. I grabbed all of my stuff that I had left there, made a smartass comment about “you have my number” and left. I haven't heard from him since. I have texted him several times, tried to be nice, I even have his Christmas present…but I have NO idea what to do. At all. Please help….

  • Profile photo of MartinMartin
    Keymaster
    Post count: 250

    Well, I've been in this situation many times.

    We all get stupid and say stupid things. You're in a stupid situation as well and you know it. He probably does to.

    Get moving and ask him for a chat so you both can get things sorted and both be happy. Tell him you did things you shouldn't. You need to move back to the happy place. Get into conversations around how better to understand each other. We're all different people with different needs and reactions. I know I react to things that my wife Pam can't understand. It's understanding each other's reactions and what you need to do to help them in those scenarios that will count in the long run.

    You'll have a great Christmas too. Learn to say ‘Sorry' for stupid things and move forward.

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