Is she just going to be a hopeless romantics dream?

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  • James Martin
    Member
    Post count: 4
    #11685 |

    Hello, My name is James and have simply lost my senses over this girl. Her name is Emily, shes a freshman and I am a junior. We've known each other for a while, 2-3 years, and have most recently started talking more often. She isn't specifically interested in me in the dating light, however she does like to flirt with me and be playful. She has already told me that she doesn't want me to become attached to her, and as my friend Jacob informed me, she has an interest in someone else. We've talked a good bit today and she passed a comment that she wouldn't mind kissing me. And another comment, a few week prior when we were talking about my feelings for her I comment that she'd come around and she said “maybe (:”. I'm guess i'm wondering whether i should continue pursuing her or to just slowly, but efficiently stop feeling for her or at least attempting to move in on her?

  • Martin
    Keymaster
    Post count: 250

    Firstly, welcome James to the site. Great to have you as a part of our community.

    This reminds me of a saying ‘Nothing ventured, nothing gained'.

    Very often in the dating ‘ritual', both people are sounded each other out, on whether there's anything in it or a possible direction to take to see whether there is anything in a possible relationship.

    Understand too that women are very cagey. They don't want to appear slutty but they do know what they think they want so there's always confusion going on. Kinda sad but it happens.

    Could I suggest you try this: You see her pretty often, I take it. Pick a casual place for a coffee and one that has subdued lighting too. Meet up and get talking about whatever you love talking about. Then approach the subject of ‘OK, so let's see how an initial kiss might feel. Are you up for it?'. It's a bit of a dare, making an opening for something to happen and an experiment so she can see if there is a spark. If you get to touching lips, there'll be a spark!

    You should certainly persue until you know for sure that there's nothing. To me, there's something – just gotta find out what it is and you won't do that until you move forward with finding out.

  • James Martin
    Member
    Post count: 4

    I took your advice and I popped a kiss on her today, she didn't object and she enjoyed herself. it was just a peck, around 1.5-2 seconds, but it was nice. I asked her if she would like to go on a date and she said she'd love to.

  • Martin
    Keymaster
    Post count: 250

    Oh, now that is way way cool, James.

    It's just about providing an opening sometimes, so the other person knows it's ok and to take some action of their own.

    All the best for the two of you too – sounds like you're in for a great time ahead.

    Oh, please do tell your friends to pop over and pay us a visit too, if that's OK. Love helping people.

  • James Martin
    Member
    Post count: 4

    I'd love to, her mom is already wishing to meet me and Prom seems to be a future as well. Thanks for all your help (:

  • Martin
    Keymaster
    Post count: 250

    Oh wow, you guys seem to be really hitting it off which is terrific.

    And thanks so much for advertising our site to all and sundry – much appreciated.

    Look forward to hearing more progress, James and congrats.

  • James Martin
    Member
    Post count: 4

    Hey, thanks again for the advice. Allow me to update you, we are going to prom and shes going dress shopping tomorrow as well as her mom wants to meet me so im getting there but I have a question. Me and Emily talked about the concept of dating at an earlier moment inbtime and she told me that she wasnt interested in me in thatvway. However I cant help but think maybe the feelings have changed, how should I approach her with it?

    • Nicky
      Participant
      Post count: 3

      What a beautiful story, James.
      How have you been with Emily after 8 months? Can you share your story?

  • Martin
    Keymaster
    Post count: 250

    James, I think it's safe to say that the situation has most certainly changed from the earlier time that you're talking about, mate.
    Now is the time to go with the flow and let the good times roll, for you both. Try to avoid over thinking what she might have said before she accepted your invitation, given you sound like you're definitely in active dating mode.

  • Anonymous
    Post count: 10

    Really good to hear about your love story and definitely you're improving in right direction. I wonder how things went afterwards. Please update if you're still here on the site.

  • Anonymous
    Post count: 1

    How have you been with Emily after 8 months? Can you share your story?

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