What’s All The Fuss About?

It can be as simple as a kiss

There’s no doubt about the fact that every relationship has its own set of demands that are ruled by love, trust and acceptance (above all else).

This is why every person desires their partner’s affection.

It takes years and years of love and affection for a relationship to grow and become strong.

The bottom line is, relationships thrive and survive on affection.

That’s how real romance grows.

Let’s now look into different ways to show affection to your partner…

Plan the Perfect Date

If you know your partner well enough, you should know her likes and dislikes.

If you do then why not plan the perfect date for her? It could be a surprise because she doesn’t have to know about it.

The idea here is do exactly what she loves, without any strings attached.

Buy Her Flowers

Every woman loves flowers – the only difference is in what type of flowers she prefers.

Buying her flowers randomly without any occasion is a great way to show you care. When it comes to the buying part, flowers from ProFlowers actually are not very expensive and you’ll find a great deal of variety as well.

So in case you’re planning to get her flowers on the date, then you should check them out.

Revisit the First Meeting / Date Place

What could be better than reminiscing about what made you a couple?

By revisiting your first meeting or date place, you’ll be able to do exactly that.

It’ll be great to realize what brought you both together, what you have learned from each other since the first time, and the future that you’re looking forward together.

Make a Handmade Greeting Card

While Valentine’s Day is the perfect occasion to share greetings, nobody’s stopping you from doing it on random days.

Creating a handmade greeting card out of the blue can prove to be a great romantic gesture.

It’ll be creative and frame-able. Something your significant other will cherish for a long time to come.

Bake Her Fresh Cookies

Who doesn’t love fresh baked cookies?

We all do.

And your better half probably loves them too. So go ahead and bake some fresh cookies for her. Let her know that you can get your hands dirty in the kitchen for her and do something as special as baking cookies! She will like your gesture and will appreciate the cookies.

What more could you ask for?

A romantic gesture that not only helps you show affection but also tastes good!

Handwrite a Letter

Yes, love letters are still very much in fashion – especially the handwritten ones.

But when it comes to writing a love letter, a lot of men think that it’s just about putting their feelings on paper. While that’s true, you need to be specific with your words to really make your partner go wow. Women don’t mind reading long love letters because they love the details.

So if and when you decide to write one for your special someone, then get into the specifics.

Expressing your affection to your better half is not a one time thing. It’s something that you will have to do over and over again. Because that’s the only way you’d be able to establish a deeper connection and create a stronger bond with her.

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Relationships – They Ebb and Flow For a Reason

We are just sand on the beach of life

Think back on all the people you no longer have anything to do with now.

There’s probably quite a few, if you’re anything like me.

You once had the best of friends and some of them are no longer active in your lives, despite the strong bonds you had back in the day.

Now place yourself back in one of those times and look forward to see all the new people that are now in your life.

When it comes to relationships and people, there’s this other sort of balance we rarely give any mind to.

The Balance of Purpose

We might be at the top of the food chain but when it comes to maintaining strong bonds and ties ‘to and from’ the people we hold in our hearts, that’s very much a finite number.

• Think of Ebb and Flow as ‘Life’s Timing’.
• Synchronicity.
• Universal Abundance.

Nothing in life is coincidence.

Everything happens for a reason, though most of us will be blind to the WHY.

We’re all here to learn lessons in growth.

Relationships End and Begin Anew

The cycle begins from what we learn as youngsters.

Parents can only teach you relationship foundations, from their experiences.

But since we’re all wired differently to our loving parents, our lessons are going to be different.

The Dating Cycle begins – we have to start somewhere and begin the acts of discovery.

The friend bonds start with those we resonate with, for the current lessons we’re neck-deep in – they’ll either stay because they’re needed or they’ll leave since they’re not. It just is.

Same Goes for Intimacy – The Learning Cycle

The dating lessons are usually the toughest to learn since there’s so much deep emotional scarring, usually. It’s still a great lesson in humility as well as success.

Click here to view the video on YouTube.

I still remember the pain from my first ‘serious’ dating relationship when we broke up.

I honestly had thoughts of ending it all. I was unable to get her out of my head. The friends I had then we an absolute blessing in that time. I coped with their support.

And the ebb and flow was, even then, at work.

Those best of friends I no longer see as I have new best friends helping me in my current situation.

Heartbreak Is Good?

• I learnt lessons in not being a total dickhead when it comes to people, in general – I learnt that, eventually.
• I learnt the characteristics of women that I liked and some I didn’t like, so much.
• I learnt about sharing.
• I learnt that the experience of sex is vastly different for women than it was for men.
• I learnt I wasn’t the most important person in the universe – most young people will eventually learn this tough lesson once their brain’s mature.
• I learnt friends will pick a side and only one.
• I learnt about forgiveness.
• I learnt life is worth living for.
• I learnt there’s many more fish in the sea and people are wonderful to experience and be around since everyone is a mentor, in some way.

Life’s Timing.

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Is this what they meant by trying a new position?

There’€™s an expression that says, the couple that works out together, stays together.

Fitness and healthy living bonds two people over mutual values of self-respect.

We have to stay healthy so we can perform our responsibility not just as parents but as partners to our wife or husband too.

Most relationships tend to fail because we tend to miss the little issues that help renew the love and commitment needed to make the relationship stronger.

When a couple gets married, their lives suddenly blend in all aspects of their life. From sharing chores and bank accounts to buying a home and raising a family, couples must support each other in order to have a happy life.

When you make a vow to be healthy together, your relationship improves. You find new ways to support and show your love for one another, and you bond over new experiences and habits that will help you both live better lives.

Here are some of the health routines you can adopt in your marriage to improve your relationship with your spouse.

Join a New Gym Together

Workouts can quickly get boring -€“ especially if you go by yourself.

Join a gym together and use your time working out as a way to bond and motivate one another.

If neither one of you are fans of going to the gym, but do so out of necessity, try mixing up your routine and joining a new type of gym.

For example, Crossfit gyms are well known for their motivation and encouragement among members. Do this with your spouse on a regular basis and you will both be celebrating your individual goals together as a team.

Celebrating these goals will bring more happiness and pride into your marriage.

Click here to view the video on YouTube.

Go Grocery Shopping Together

When grocery shopping is left to just one person, it can quickly become a boring routine. This is when unhealthy decisions are made and couples fight.

Instead of bickering about groceries, make it a team effort. Go to the store together to pick out healthy snacks and encourage each other to stay on track.

This turns a regular chore into an encouraging act between husband and wife.

Take this to the next level by researching recipes together ahead of time and setting up date nights to make healthier dinners together.

This is a fun way to come together in the kitchen and create delicious food to stimulate the senses.

Sign Up for a New Race Together

Training and eating healthy is fun, but having an event to look forward to and work hard for is even better.

Sign up for something fun, such as a mud run, color run or 5k race in your area. If you are passionate about a cause, you can sign up for a charity event to benefit your favorite non-profit organization.

Doing this brings you together in a new way and gives you and your spouse something exciting to look forward to.

Relationships take work, but healthy living is one of the best ways that couples can come together, show love for one another and inspire each other to be the best person they can be.

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Grow old together, in love and passion

Life Over 50: Keeping The Romance Alive

When you’ve been married for a long time there are lots of things which will form part of your daily lives together.

• Household chores
• Money issues
• Worrying about the kids (even if they’ve left home!)

Those are just some of the things which can take over and leave you feeling that you’ve lost the spark which brought you together in the first place.

Romance is important for any relationship, whether you’ve just got together or you’re celebrating your 25th wedding anniversary.

Here are some tips for how to keep things interesting in your marriage.

Romance isn’t just reserved for the youth, you know

Communicate

Make sure you make time to talk to each other every day so that you know what’s going on in each other’s lives.

Too many couples think they are communicating when they’ve got one eye on their laptops or phones. Try and switch off all other distractions and have a focused conversation.

It’ll help you feel closer to each other.

Have A Date Night

Having a regular date night can give you the chance to see each other in a new light.

Pick things that you both like to do and try to mix it up. You could take it in turns to choose where you go from one week to the next.

Dating websites such as eHarmony Australia have plenty of ideas for fun date activities.

Older love is beautiful to look and a little rare too

Go Away For The Weekend

Another way to enjoy each other’s company is to take a break together.

Go somewhere you haven’t been before and explore a new place.

A holiday is a great way to spend more time together whilst having fun.

Acts of Kindness

If you make time to do things for your partner because you know they’ll appreciate it, there’s nothing more romantic.

Cook them their favourite meal or surprise them with tickets to a play you know they’d love.

Doing things for the enjoyment of it, rather than because you feel obligated, will help you feel more connected.

Show Affection

You might know that you love each other through and through but showing affection can help to reinforce the bond you share. Sometimes when couples have been together a long time, they forget that showing physical affection is important in making their other half feel loved.

Being close with each other is a great way to keep the spark alive.

You’ve supported each other through thick and thin, but why lose out on the exciting things which brought you together in the first place? Older couples can enjoy romance at any stage in the relationship.

Make time for each other and have fun with some of these tips.

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Do you remember Susan Boyle and her first appearance?

The Book and The Cover

Can you judge a book by its cover?

For some people looks are the most important issue when making a connection with a potential partner.

For others, they look towards signals such as sense of humor and sensitivity to judge whether a person has potential.

I’ll discuss what your appearance says about you and how you can use this to your advantage.

So What’s It Say?

What does your appearance say about you?

Whether we want to accept it or not, we live in a society in which image is everything. The way we present ourselves, from the clothes that we wear to our hairstyle and even how we smell, are all major players in how someone will perceive you on first meeting.

Visual signals can give away people’s personality traits, and, if we’re completely honest with ourselves, we’ve all been guilty as charged at some point or other of reinforcing the old adage ‘€˜to judge a book by its cover’€™ on a more than frequent basis.

This non-verbal communication is just as important as what comes out of our mouths.

In fact more so in a lot of ways, because whether it’€™s right or wrong, this can set a precedent for how people judge us. Of course, it’€™s what’€™s on the inside that matters. However, many of us believe that the way we present ourselves on the outside speaks volumes about exactly that.

Looks matter to everyone, from your love interests to a job interviewer.

It can be a harsh reality of life, but if your clothes are crumpled, your hair dishevelled, and shoes scuffed you may be about to bomb at that job interview or maybe not get asked on a second date.

Dress for Success

When it comes to career advancement in the workplace, it should be your skills that make you shine.

Your image can also speak volumes about your work ethic and level of professionalism.

According to one US study 95% of employers said a jobseeker’€™s personal appearance affected their opinion of that applicants’ suitability for the job.

A whopping 91% said they believed dress and grooming reflected the applicant’s attitude towards the company and 61% said it had an effect on subsequent promotions.

So, it seems that sending your sharp suit to the dry cleaners, taking an iron to your shirts and thoroughly polishing shoes will win out on any day. I’m a firm believer that what you wear on the outside reflects your personality and aims.

So if put in the effort when dressing for that job interview, your future employer will see that the effort and execution is a reflection of dedication to high quality work.

Click here to view the video on YouTube.

The Psychology of Dress

It’s a fact.

As endless ‘€˜makeover’€™ TV programmes testify, changing your image can change your life for the better.

You can use your wardrobe to change how others perceive you -€“ and even how you think about yourself.

This has been referred to as ‘€œthe psychology of dress’ – a powerful tool that can be both empowering and damaging in equal measures.

Choosing the right clothes for a situation (and your age), avoiding any obvious fashion faux pas (guys ‘socks with sandals’€ ahem!), and generally taking pride in your appearance will not only create a positive first impression, it’€™ll be a real confidence builder for you, whatever the situation.

Nobody expects you to be packaged into something you’re not, but your appearance is a reflection of your own self-esteem and you should aim to do your personality some justice by portraying yourself in the best light.

I strongly believe that projecting confidence can grow to genuine confidence.

What To Do With The Knowledge

So how can you and I take these facts and lessons into our everyday life?

Here’s why you never judge by outwardly appearance

I don’t think anyone expects you to dress like something you’re not. That doesn’t make sense. Feeling comfortable in your own skin is really important, it means we can be ourselves and not feel alien to our friends, family and colleagues.

What is important is making that effort.

My school teachers used to tell me “If you try hard, you have a better chance of succeeding”, and they were right.

Going that little bit further or working a little bit harder at something, pays dividends.

This applies to many areas of life, including the way we dress.

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Should he or doesn’t it matter?

Come on, Does It Really Matter?

It is a very valid question.

We guess it all boils down to how much of a traditionalist you are.

If you haven’€™t yet entered into the 21st Century in your mind, then you may now be sitting there with your mouth wide open; completely aghast at such a suggestion.

In these modern times it is becoming all the more common for the lady to propose.

Tradition!

In many countries around the world there is a tradition that a woman can propose to a man on a day that only occurs once every four years; February 29th.

The whole story behind it is incredibly dated, as are the consequences.

Thought to come from a deal that was struck between St. Bridget and St. Patrick (and lest we forget that these people were alive some two and a half thousand years ago), if a lady was refused marriage upon asking, the gentleman would then have to shower her with gifts to somehow hide the woman’€™s embarrassment.

He might as well have said yes!

We apologise, but we must treat such a dated tradition with a little bit of humour.

Papa Don’€™t Preach

Then there is asking the woman’€™s father for her hand in marriage.

Again, this is a somewhat dated idea but one that is still performed to this very day.

This writer attempted to do exactly that only two years ago, only to be laughed away by prospective fiancee and father alike.

You could surmise that the whole idea of asking a future father-in-law reeks of chauvinism and sexism and you’€™re probably right.

It is a process that has been dying out over the last few decades and will soon be looked upon as something incredibly archaic. There will be the odd person (not literally) that may see it as quite a sweet gesture however, but it should be noticeable from your significant other’€™s face when you suggest it, whether or not it is a good idea.

However, there are exceptions to the rule.

In a recent study with students at the somewhat left-wing UC Santa Cruz, not one of the 277 (heterosexual) students who were asked could agree with the idea of a woman asking a man to marry him.

Well that was no doubt a turn up for the books and it seems tradition is still alive and well in some parts.

Doing the Deed

But when it comes down to it, there may still be some women that are fed up of waiting for their prospective husbands to get down on one knee, so here are a few tips as to how you should go about it, if you can’€™t wait until 2016.

Click here to view the video on YouTube.

Firstly; and this isn’€™t meant to sound patronising; be cool.

You may have had visions of this moment going the other way since you were little and a lot of people do. If you’€™re worried about rejection, dontt be. If the worst comes to the worst then at least you’€™ll get twelve pairs of gloves or a nice dress (if tradition is to believed!).

Next, use a little bit of common sense. If you’€™ve been walking around town and he’€™s been edging you towards bridal stores or jewellers, then there may be a good chance he‒s thinking the same thing. Not that it should stop you of course and you could have a little psyche-out competition to see who caves in first. It’s all very romantic when you think about it.

Prepare well; if you’€™re serious about doing this then why not propose to him at one of his favourite places? We’€™re not suggesting that you hire out the local sports stadium and propose to him in the centre circle or end zone, but maybe somewhere that you both consider a special place. We’€™ll leave that up to your own imagination.

Lastly, speak from the heart.

If you’re planning on reeling off a long speech,€“ try to keep it brief. It’s probably not every day that he hears this stuff from you and you don’€™t want him to cotton on to what is happening too soon.

We’€™re sure you’€™ll be absolutely fine, and wish you good luck. All you’€™ll need to do once you’€™re engaged is plan the wedding and we’re sure that’€™ll be a piece of cake in comparison!

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Remember The Older Folk, OK?

An important day for your parents so make it a great time to remember

Looking for a gift is quite simple when you know what to look for.

Several things can be taken into account to guide you pick the most suitable gift idea, including hobby, fashion taste and likes.

No matter what occasion, the quest of finding an ideal gift is never challenging if you know well the recipient.

Have you spent many hours browsing the net for nice presents for your parent’s golden wedding anniversary? There are tons of items you can find over the web (which might just confuse you). All you need to do is think of how you want your gift to bring joy to your parents.

Do you want your gift to be plainly decorative?

Or you prefer the item to be used daily? Below are a few items that will make wonderful wedding anniversary gifts.

Engraved Golden Photo Frame

Search for photo frame with gold hue.

If you find it hard hunting for golden frame, you can just buy any shade and color it yourself. Use a spray paint to coat the frame with gold color.

Why gold?

Obviously, it is meant to commemorate the golden anniversary of your parents. Once you have the frames, you can take it to an engraver to add the names of your parents along with the wedding dates. Some stores offer free engraving service if you bought the items from them.

Pick the most memorable picture of your parents and insert it into the frames. Otherwise, you can choose a photo of you together with your mom and dad.

This gift holds a lasting memory of you and your parents – a cherished possession for a lifetime.

Personalized Mr. and Mrs. Mugs

Choosing mugs as wedding gift might sound ordinary.

Mug is just a typical kitchen ware you can find in many stores. So how come it makes an ideal wedding anniversary gift? Adding a personal touch to the mug can already turn it into a special gift item. Look for gift shops offering custom-made designs. Add the name of your mom on the mug while the name of your dad on the other mug.

You can also request to print the picture of your parents on their respective mug.

A pair of mug is a useful gift to your parents.

They can use it in drinking coffee or tea. So while they are taking a sip of the coffee, they can remember you through the mug.

Personalized Scrapbook

A distinctive way to please your parents is by crafting a scrapbook of their love story.

Gather as many photos of your parents as you can including child photos, first anniversary images and others. Arrange these photographs starting from their younger years up to the present. Stick the pictures on the pages of the scrapbook. Embellish the pages by sticking some decorative pieces like small flowers, ribbons etc. Add quirky captions on each photo to bring more life to these collections.

All the materials needed to create a scrapbook can be bought in school supply store.

Crafting this gift is never a problem.

Practical Items

Are you thinking of a more practical items?

That’s great!

Practical things are those items your parents can use after the wedding anniversary event. For instance, you can buy bed pillows which can offer your mother and father comfort while sleeping. To add a personal touch to your gift, have their names embroidered on the cushion case. These soft, embroidered cushions can give your parents good night sleep.

Even quality cheese and wine can be a special gift

If you are concerned about the health and safety of your parents, you can give them alert system, like medical guardian, so that they can quickly inform anybody when an accident occurs. Other items you can think of are alarm clock, glasses and touch lamps.

Remember, gifts do not have to be pricey. Price is never a basis of a gift item. The most important thing is your golden wedding anniversary gift is given heartily and it brings joy to your elderly parents.

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I’m so freaking confused! What’s she mean when she talks?

Huh? – Said Every Man Since The Dawn Of Time

It’s not any kind of secret language, but still men have difficulty in understanding those simple words that women say.

Well, it’s not actually words with secret meanings, but simple words and basic things.

Since decades, men have remained wondering about women, their ways, their behavior and especially their words. Some men even think women to be mysterious creatures just because they didn’t know what women’s words meant.

And now, to set the record straight, women have a few words for men.

Of course, with explanations!

Fine…

The word every women uses to end an argument is ‘Fine.’

Just as you got the word ‘Fine’ out of her mouth, don’t think you won. She knows that she is right, but said it, to shut you up, as she realized that you will not abide by or acknowledge her superior judgment.

So, wait for Round Two.

At times when she is really satisfied with your argument, she just says the magical words ‘I Love You’ and ends it.

I Always…

She would have started at least a million conversations like she wanted this and that and has never got a chance to do it.

So, what do you think?

Do you think she is sharing her life history with you?

Nope!

She is trying to tell you that she wants to do it and needs your help in it.

Just Five Minutes…

Go and watch football! It’s not just five minutes, but at least an hour.

She expects you to wait patiently till she gets dressed up. Stop! You can’t just blame women in this. After all, this is what you exactly do when the match is on or while in a party with friends. And sometimes, you even cancel the trip or program, just because of your laziness.

So, it’s just a Tit for Tat.

I Am So Sick Of…

She will be sick of many things, but she says it only when she very badly needs a break.

When she says it, she doesn’t want you to console her or make her feel she is doing good, but she wants your help and wants you to spend time with her.

Nothing…

Click here to view the video on YouTube.

There’s something for sure!

When she is in a problem, she means that you will never understand what she is going through.

But, if she has started the conversation with ‘Nothing,’ then get ready for an argument that’s obviously going to end with the word ‘Fine.’

You Don’t Understand…

She usually says this when having an emotional conversation with you.

This doesn’t mean that you don’t understand what she is saying, but, you don’t understand how she is feeling about it. If she says this, it means that she is feeling unsupported and wants your support very badly.

Just hug her, she will be fine.

Go Ahead…

Wait! It’s not an assent or permission.

Trust me, it’s nothing short of a dare! She is asking you to get out of her site for at least 10 minutes.

If you linger, she will start an argument over ‘NOTHING.’

That’s Okay… Don’t Worry… I Will Take Care…

These are the most dangerous statements women can ever make to men.

In this case, she really means it and she doesn’t want you to worry about it for the time being.

But, she also means she needs to think hard before deciding how, when, what and where you will have to pay for your mistake.

And It Doesn’t Just Stop There

Do at your own peril :)

That’s not all, there are many more words like:

• Thanks,
• Please do,
• Thanks a lot,
• You know me, etc.

……. that have a totally different meaning. To be honest, it’s not that easy to learn women’s words with secret meanings. And it’s far easy to understand women’s feelings with her look compared to her secret words.

So, rather than trying to find out what she really meant, know her feelings with her look.

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Juliet’s What If Journey of Discovery

The ‘What If’ Journey

In this digital age, love letters, particularly the handwritten ones, have become a rarity.

The fact that they are rare makes you want to treasure them more, if you’re lucky enough to receive one.

Letters I believe are also more personal because they are handwritten.

You can almost imagine the emotions that come with every loop in each consonant or vowel.

Shaky handwriting could be a sign of nervousness as emotions are transformed into words – words that someone never had the courage to voice out.

And so he or she had a little help from the power of the pen.

Letter writing brings back the romance of words, a powerful tool that men once used – and sometimes still do – to woo their lady loves.

I’m Reminded By …

It also makes me think of the 2010 movie, Letters to Juliet and the pivotal letter that drove Claire to find her first and true love, Lorenzo:

Dear Claire,

“What” and “If” are two words as non-threatening as words can be. But put them together side-by-side and they have the power to haunt you for the rest of your life:

What if?

What if?

What if?

I don’t know how your story ended but if what you felt then was true love, then it’s never too late. If it was true then, why wouldn’t it be true now? You need only the courage to follow your heart. I don’t know what a love like Juliet’s feels like: love to leave loved ones for, love to cross oceans for, but I’d like to believe if I ever were to feel it, that I’d have the courage to seize it.

And Claire, if you didn’t, I hope one day that you will.

All my love, Juliet

Repeat After Me:

The contents of this lovely letter was compelling enough for the elderly Claire to look for the writer, a young American woman named Sophie.

She also decided to follow Sophie’s advice to seek out Lorenzo Bartolini, her long-lost love.

Ever Had Those Words Yourself?

When was the last time you ever received a love letter that’s been painstakingly handwritten? When did someone’s words touch you so much that they led you on a journey of self-discovery and love?

In Claire’s case, “what if” became the catalyst for her search to find the answers that she has been looking for all her life. Never mind that she is already a grandmother.

All that mattered was following her heart and believing in true love. As it turned out, she had her happy ending when she found and wed Lorenzo.

Make It Real?

You may think that stories like these only happen in the movies.

But they have happened in real life, only on a less grander scale and it didn’t involve traveling to Italy.

As we are living in a digital age, most people would use Facebook or an online area code directory to search for that person who once – or still – meant the world to them.

• Don’t set your expectations too high or you might end up disappointed.
• Be open to the possibilities – both sad and happy.

If you don’t try to explore “what ifs”, you might end up wondering the rest of your life about the road not taken.

Click here to view the video on YouTube.

If you must regret something, make it something worthy of regret.

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Let The Screams Begin

Men can afford to buy gifts if they think about it

I can hear those guys sighing in the back, over there.

They’ve always known it.

Forget to get the lady a gift on the ‘anniversary of the day you first noticed me’ and they’re cooked.

But They Cost Money!

Guys are so hooked up on money and not wanting to spend to receive. When it comes to gifts, you’ve got salary sacrifice options, you can put a little away each week or simply look for low budget gifts from markets – there isn’t any excuse for not being able to afford a gift!

If you want to know just how important gifts are in a relationship, take a poll of the millions of twenty and thirty-something, long suffering guys.

They know all about it.

1. You Just Can’t Win Otherwise

There are days that make a person feel special.

Only thing is, with the fair sex, there are many days that make them feel special. There are anniversaries of when the two of you met, when you first kissed and when you two started going steady.

The ladies have this fantastic ability to remember special days. Don’t ask me how they do it. On that day, when you’re all tired and fuzzy (and your memory’s done a bunk), their eyes will check for a bulge in your shirt pocket.

A gift, you think?

Of course a gift!

What else?

2. A Gift Helps Clear Up Jealous Fits

If you’re savvy like me, you’ll visit one of those discount thrift stores and buy some pretty things in advance.

Buy them, get them gift wrapped and stock up, guys.

I am telling you, this strategy never fails. The day you know she’s going to throw a jealous fit coz some friend of hers saw you with an old flame, whip out a pre-bought, pre-parcelled gift and the game’s yours.

Store your gifts for her away from gifts for men you know; don’t mix them up, or your goose is well and truly cooked!

3. It’s Just The Thing When You Cannot Explain

Just like a picture is worth a thousand words, a gift is worth a thousand explanations that could go wrong from the first word.

Just shut up, and present something with a flourish.

Add some goofy, romantic bit about how much you missed her. Tell her you’re sorry about whatever it was but thoughts of her keep distracting you. When you’ve done something that just cannot be explained, let the gift do the talking for you.

It’s just a small thing, but a gift bears a powerful message, and speaks so much better than you ever can.

4. A Gift Increases Your Reputation

This one is real important, so listen up.

Click here to view the video on YouTube.

From the moment you start dating seriously, your social reputation is out of your hands. Why, you wonder? Stop wondering, I’ll tell you. Women talk. They share every itty bitty thing with their gal pals and the gals then tell their boyfriends everything.

Even the mafia is not as well linked as the female ladies room network (yes, that’s where most of the ‘do you know’ gossiping happens).

What are the odds that your boss hears of your latest escapade before you’ve had time to think it over?

Trust me, a gift now and then ‘just like that’ will keep you in everyone’s good books, jerk or not. After all, how wrong can you or your intentions be, if you keep spending on her? And could you possibly be the insensitive kind, if you are always ready to make up in the sweetest way, memento in tow?

5. Gifts Can Get You Entry Into Privy Networks

A hushed word here and a hushed word there – that’s all it takes.

All of a sudden, doors open, parents are happy with you, and you get introduced to their peers. Then follow the invites to golf parties, to family events, clubs – hell, maybe even a great job recommendation! It’s not without perks, my brothers.

Keep the gifts coming.

Just don’t make it look orchestrated or unnatural.

6. Gifts Can Make You Hard To Replace

You have to put in some real effort here. Remember the ‘special anniversaries’, track her PMS days and gift something on odd days just to cheer her up. Make sure you don’t run out of gift ideas; observing your girl and watching what she wears, eats and watches should give you enough ideas.

You don’t have to blow money on each gift, just make sure it sends out the right message.

You’ll be real hard to replace, man.

7. Gifts Make Moving On That Much Easier

Your girlfriend’s girlfriends know you to be the gifting kind (the very best kind). Their boyfriends’ sisters know it, and so do their boyfriends and so on. Honestly, pretty much the entire county knows it and so do the moms of all the pretty girls around.

So if you girlfriend does drop you, no issues.

You can easily get dates.

That’s the way to go!

Express Your Thoughts

Author Bio: Teena works for Adrenalin, an Australian gifts website with over 2,000 gift ideas for men across Australia and New Zealand.

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Don’t Try This At Home!

Most relationship gurus will give couples the advice that each person should have time to pursue individual hobbies and interests.

I completely agree with the importance of this, and I want to build on that popular mantra by saying that in addition to separate activities, a couple should also make sure they have shared activities that they can regularly pursue together.

One of the greatest examples of this is hiking.

Now that is spectacular – exercise and hiking with your babe. Get some!

My partner and I didn’€™t have a lot in common when we started dating.

We are from completely different parts of the world (literally), we grew up leading very dissimilar lifestyles, and we had extremely different tastes and interests.

Pursuing individual pastimes was not difficult for us – it was actually more of a challenge to find activities we could enjoy together!

And Then Hiking Saw The Light of Day

One day my partner suggested the idea of us going hiking together.

I had been hiking many times prior to this, but since we started dating, hadn’€™t had as much time.

I was a bit hesitant at first because she wasn’t really an ‘€œoutdoorsy’ type of girl, so I chose our first trail very carefully.

I tried to make sure it was relatively easy, but still scenic enough that she might fall in love with hiking.

To my surprise, she did, and she has become as keen of an advocate for the activity as I am!

We both look forward to going hiking every weekend, and we even plan our vacations to include hiking adventures. It has brought us much closer together as a couple.

Sharing Is Caring

There are many reasons why hiking is such a great shared interest to have.

The biggest is that it has a very low barrier to entry in terms of both cost and skill level. It is not difficult to find a nearby hiking trail, and you really don’€™t need that much equipment when you go for less than a day – just some water and emergency supplies.

As long as you choose the trail to suit your skill level, there is almost no learning curve.

Being Adventurous

Wow – can you see yourselves hiking together now?

Another great thing that it brings to a couple is a shared sense of adventure.

Climbing a trail to a viewpoint and being rewarded with a fantastic vista is rewarding in and of itself, but when you can share that awe-inspiring effect with the person you love, it is exponentially better! Even something like having a dangerous close encounter with a bear can bring you closer together.

You will share the memory of that adventure with each other for the rest of your lives (but please do make sure that you employ proper hiking safety precautions to keep you and your partner safe!).

Experience Calm

Walking through forests and valleys, up mountains, and down canyons, will create a calming effect for both of you.

Click here to view the video on YouTube.

There have been many times where my partner and I will have had a disagreement, but any resentment that stems from it immediately dissipates as soon as we start to plan our next hike, or take that first step on a new trail.

Human beings are after all, creatures of nature, and we are not meant to be cooped up all the time in office buildings and apartments.

Getting out in the wilderness really does have a therapeutic effect that cannot be overstated.

This will translate to your relationship when you go hiking together.

Why I Recommend It…

Hiking really has become a staple of my relationship.

It is something that allows us work together, and share incredible experiences with each other. Because it is relatively easy to get started, I would highly recommend it to any couple as something to pursue together.

It is extremely important to be well informed when you go hiking. Visit that link for great info on how to get started, what to bring with you, and how to stay safe on the trails!

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Or Have I? You Tell Me.

Am I right or wrong in what i say?

When it comes to love, I am a newbie.

I am not experienced in the ways of love and romance.

I have no idea what I am doing.

I did not feel prepared at all to spend my life with another person, sharing everything with them.

Who could?

Who does?

Nothing in all our experiences of youth can prepare us for something so drastic. Something so permanent. To spend, literally, the rest of your life with another seems like a daunting task.

However in my years of marriage I have learned a few things:

Fear is Powerful

I get full of fear at times.

• Fear that I will mess it up somehow.
• That I have picked the wrong person.
• That I will get hurt.
• That I will be miserable.

I know there are up and down times to every life, and yet I fear those down times with a passion. There is just something within me that whispers “you have done it all wrong and now you are stuck.”€

Than what?

What do I do?

There are Good Times

Then there are the up times.

The times where I feel like the luckiest person in the world.

I have met my soul mate, the one I was meant to be with, and we will be together forever. There is no looking back during the high points. No regrets or even thought of what might have been. I am unable to picture my life without this person at my side, without our hands intertwined.

This is perfection and I revel in these moments.

There are Boring Times

These are the times when nothing seems to happen.

• You are both busy or stressed or bored.
• Nothing sounds good.

You are not having fun, but you are not really fighting either.

Everything in the world seems kind of grey and boring. You feel listless and unsatisfied. Breaking out of the doldrums is difficult at times, but worth the effort.

Life can’t be always perfect, always exciting, always on.

Sometimes you need the boring times to remind you what fun is like.

There are Bad Times

Then there are the down times.

Learn from the bad and prosper in the good

Those times when I feel like I could happily walk off and never look back.
The times in which I am hurt and angry, upset and confused.

• How can one person do this to me?
• How could I let someone in, let someone close enough to hurt me this badly?
• Why wasn’€™t I more careful?
• Why wasn’€™t I wiser?
• Why did I choose this path?

The questions whirl around in my mind and I fight the urge to lash out, to hurt and hurt alike. To get vengeance for slights and see my betrayed expression reflected back at me.

But I don’t.

Love Transcends

€“I do not lash out, hurt back, because I know that is not what love is. Love is not about hurting the person that hurt you. That is the fastest way to a broken relationship. Instead it is about transcending the bad times and accepting that you are both human.

You make mistakes, you hurt and get hurt and life moves on.

Constant Consistence

Feeling loving is different than being loving.

The feeling of being in love with someone can ebb and flow.

Sometimes you love them a lot and other times you can barely stand to be around them. However the key is constancy. You need to act the same whether you are feeling loving or not. You need to provide the same support, give the same number of hugs and kisses, and just be yourself around them no matter how loving you feel.

You see, just because the feeling fades does not mean that you fade.

You should have enough love, the act not the feeling, to be the person that you need to be.

When to Listen

Listening is underrated.

Click here to view the video on YouTube.

Many times in life I have just needed someone to listen and others have just needed me to listen.

That does not mean I have to listen and fix something or listen and take on the guilt or worry or stress?

No, real listening is just about giving your undivided attention to another. Listening is simple and yet hard. You have a thousand other things you could be doing with your time but you chose to listen. That is why listening is such a wonderful thing to do.

Know when to listen and how to listen.

Do not think about what you are going to say.

Just listen.

When to Speak

Communication is an important part of a strong, lasting relationship.

I am not just talking about discussing your meal plans or when you have to work late, but real communication.

• Expressing your needs and desires.
• Setting boundaries and goals for the two of you in life.
• Talking about hard things like money or children.

I have always had a hard time expressing my emotions, but I have learned that it is necessary to do so in order to have a strong and healthy relationship that will last. No one can read your mind. You have to tell people what they do to upset you, what makes you happy and what you can’€™t stand.

Use your words and learn how to share your thoughts and feelings with another. Not everyone has the same needs. I may need my partner to hug and kiss me to feel loved, but my partner may need me to say nice things or help out around the house or give gifts.

We all have different needs and desires and it is only by communicating that you can really understand another person.

Don’t be a Martyr, Don’t be a Thief

There are three types of people in relationships.

The healthy people

the martyrs

and the thieves.

Healthy People

Healthy people give and get love equally.

They expect their partner to give them the love they need to be happy and healthy and they freely give their partner what they need to be happy and healthy.

The Martyrs

A martyr is a person who gives and gives and expects nothing in return.

They are continually empty of love because they don’t ask for it. Even the most loving of partners has to rely on you to tell them what you need. Otherwise they will assume that you are getting it!

Do not be miserable in your relationship because you feel like you are giving all the love. Sometimes you have to ask for what you need. This does not lessen the love you get at all! Do not fall under the fallacy that your partner should just ‘€œknow’€ what you need.

Ask to get your needs met.

Eventually your partner will get the idea, but only after you have expressed and enforced it many times over!

The Thieves

The last type of person is the thief.

They take and take and take love without ever giving any in return. Or what they do give is so small that it is laughable.

Some people do this because that is the way they grew up, some do this out of ignorance or thinking that they are giving in a way you do not recognize, others do this because they are selfish, plain and simple. However thieves can be reformed. You have to demand what you need from them. It is not fun and if they refuse then you may have to reconsider your relationship with them.

It is very hard to have a relationship that is one sided.

Praise is Important

Last but not least, remember to praise your partner.

• Everyone needs to be lifted up.
• The world around us is always looking for ways to tear us down.

We are not pretty enough or thin enough or rich enough or smart enough. Make sure that your partner knows how much you appreciate them. Even in the little things be mindful of giving praise.

Taking out the trash, wiping up a spill, and drying the dishes are all worthy of praise. Be happy to see them come home, whether they have been gone thirty minutes or thirty days. Lifting your partner up with positivity will not only make them feel better but will make you appreciate them more.

Yes, we all have faults and things we could do better, but you should be the one pointing out all the things your partner does right.

Being married is not an easy road to take, especially when you are in it for a lifetime. However it is well worth the effort and I am thankful every day for the relationship I have.

I feel blessed to have someone who I can count on, who I can love and who loves me in return.

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What’s Out There For ME?

I remember the days of thinking that everything I had ever wanted was “out there somewhere”.

The perfect body, financial situation and of course, partner were out of my reach and remained elusive.

Maybe one day, luck would be in my corner and I would finally get everything my heart desired. If I were a good person, then perhaps life would reward me and fulfill my wishes.

In fact, maybe I would even find “the one”.

Yada yada yada…

Was I Being Played With?

If I could place an image to my ongoing quest for the perfect circumstances that never came my way, it would look like a dangling carrot.

It was as if the Universe, with its superb sense of humor (at my expense of course) was intentionally toying with my emotions, by offering the promise of what I wanted only to taketh away once it seemed to be within my grasp.

I can’t even begin to elaborate on the level of frustration that perspective caused me to experience.

It’s called resistance to “what is”…and it’s painful.

Are You Like I Was?

Well back then I was the type of person who was motivated by pain.

What adversity inspired me to do, thankfully, was to look within and ask some probing questions…

• Who am I?
• What am I to learn from this?
• What do I really want? Is it the ‘thing’ I say I want
• …or the feelings that ‘the thing’ is intended to provide?

Once I got out of my own way – in other words, questioned my thoughts and quieted my mind – I received some interesting guidance. It went something like this…

And then, you still may not get it….but I’ll explain that in a bit.

But First Consider This …

Now before judging the aforementioned sentence, here is something to consider…

• When we are in a state of being that focuses on lack, we may think we know what we want, but we usually don’t.
• We want what we believe is missing in our lives.

But what if I told you that what we see (or don’t see) out there is nothing more than a reflection of a belief that we hold within us that we wouldn’t recognize if it didn’t show up in front of us (again, out there) to cause an inner-reaction?

So let’s take relationships for example.

That Elusive “THE ONE FOR ME”

Have you noticed that whenever you are focused on finding “the one”, you never meet them?

It’s as if NOTHING you do turns out right.

You can be at the top of your game in other areas of life, yet somehow, this thing you want so badly continues to elude you.

You blame society / the dating site / your co-workers / the drive-thru operator / your lousy upbringing / politics / being vegan and everything else for the fact that what you desperately want -

Won’t.

Come.

To.

You.

It works the same way with weight related issues, finances and everything else out there.

Here’s The Analogy

So what would happen if instead of focusing on what you want but don’t have, you took a step back from this mentality and looked to take responsibility for your perception of your reality?

If you feel you need someone to somehow “make you feel whole” or “complete you”, then what it is within you that feels incomplete?

I was free the day I had finally realized that what I was looking for in a partner was someone to validate me. I realized that I needed someone else to love me because it would prove (temporarily) that I was worthy of being loved.

I didn’t understand that what I really needed to do was love and accept myself and not rely on some external circumstance to provide me with something I needed to learn to do on my own.

It was a matter of understanding that …

I AM ENOUGH.

Once you realize that you ARE enough, that relationship you had once craved suddenly becomes less important.

This is because what you really wanted was what the relationship represented, not the relationship itself.

And now that you are no longer in resistance to what you wanted outside of yourself now that you have found it within, you are open to the idea of a relationship, but no longer in desperate need of it.

You have become what you wanted and may no longer need it show up out there.

YOU are “the one”.

So if you are feeling that the love you desire is out of your reach, it may benefit you to remove the resistance to what you don’t see “out there” and instead, focus on what may be missing within you.

You never know what else you may find out about yourself :)

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Love Or Legal?

Can you have love and a Prenup?

When we fall in love — hard and fast — we tend to get high on emotions, and more often than not, become blind to reason.

We are so giddy on cloud nine that we let impulse take over and indulge in rash decisions like getting hitched in Vegas.

Once the happy fog has lifted, regret comes in its place as we bear the brunt of the repercussions of our actions, especially when the quickie wedding ends in divorce.

Divorce doesn’t always end up amicably and when you have a fortune to protect, things can get downright nasty.

Here are some of the reasons why you should consider a prenuptial agreement:

You Rake in Dough

There is a reason why business and pleasure must never mix.

Hedonistic pleasures can get you into trouble and rob you blind when you’re not looking.

If you own a business empire, you have the right to protect your assets especially from those who will try to prey on you.

Fortune hunters are a reality of life and some will try to charm their way into your life–and your bank account.

Say That Again?

Who earns more money is also an issue between spouses especially when the female earns more than the male counterpart.

Diamonds Are Forever But…

The diamond solitaire on your finger may spell forever, but it’s sad to say that the simpler ring beside it may not last as long.

Although we like to believe in happily-ever-after and till death do us part, the truth is the rate of divorces happening is increasing daily.

Marriage seems to be the new dating game for celebrities like Kim Kardashian who married Kris Humphries after a whirlwind courtship, only to file for divorce after 72 days.

A legal battle is still going on after a judge decided that Kardashian’s case should go to trial. I’m not saying that all marriages end in divorce, only that it’s better to be prepared for any contingency that may arise if you do decide to get married. If you want to save on legal fees, there are prepaid legal plans that have affordable monthly rates.

Proof of Love?

So you decide to follow your heart despite the possibility that he is marrying you for money.

He claims he loves you and you want to believe it with all your heart. Why not ask proof of his love by signing a prenup? He may counter that you don’t love or trust him enough because you’re letting him sign one. That counter accusation is sure to bring more doubt into the love equation.

If he really does love you, riches shouldn’t matter to him and he’d be eager to sign the document that will protect the wealth that you have accumulated over the years.

A prenuptial agreement may sound cold especially if you’re a romantic at heart.

Still, if your wealth will make a target for gold diggers, you should have sufficient means to protect yourself and your future heirs. A prenuptial agreement can help you resolve future legal issues and prevent the divorce from turning into a sordid mess.

If your partner is the one with the fortune, he may ask you to sign one as he may be used to people who will try to use him for his wealth.

Click here to view the video on YouTube.

Before you decide to sign it, however, make sure it is fair and that your interests will be protected in case he suddenly files for a divorce or cheats on you.

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Put Aside 15 Minutes and Be Inspired

Just get cracking and watch these.

Your life will be different afterwards.

Never Judge a Book By It’s Cover

Human beings tend to initially judge people by their looks and not their internal talent.

If this doesn’t change your mind that there’s more to a person by their exterior then nothing will.

Click here to view the video on YouTube.

Put Aside Your Petty Skin Colour and Be a Human

South Africa at the present moment is a melting pot of confusion and reverse racism.

Whether you’ve heard of Nelson Mandela and his humble rise to ‘humble power’ or not, Morgan Freeman epitomises Mandela’s innate yearning to unite the disparate SA Nation to be better than it’s roots and forge a better Rainbow Nation.

He had (and still has) total conviction and desire to stop racism and unite his country as one people.

My opinion thus far: The current SA Government are a greedy bunch of people, destroying the Mandela Dream.

The video is a must watch.

Click here to view the video on YouTube.

Forget The Money

Wow, I saw this recently and reminded me of the post I did just last week on the futility of money focus.

This is likely to be one of those videos you’ll ponder on for a while.

Click here to view the video on YouTube.

3 Minutes of Musical and Passionate Inspiration

OK, I’m an old softie when it comes to the Gipsy Kings.

Got a few albums myself.

These dudes know how to bring their music alive to the audience.

Click the ‘Play’ button, close your eyes and let your mind carry you away to where it needs to be.

This one always puts me in a happy mood

How about you?

Click here to view the video on YouTube.

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