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How I Got Over Having my Dignity Destroyed

And It Ain't Easy, Bud

There are many things in this world that can ruin your life, but by far the most potent amongst these is the heart.

It is a fickle creature indeed, and is as fragile as a cardboard box full of paper-thin crystal glasses falling out of an airplane.

Having it broken is a part of life, and everyone goes through it.

I did, and it was absolutely terrible.

Did it get me down and bring me dangerously close to depression?

Yes it did.

However, I got out of it (not without a struggle, of course).

On the other side there was a lot more than just closure waiting for me.

treat everybody awesome

treat everybody awesome

 

Distance is a B*tch

I learned a lot about myself and about life in general, as well as the need to keep one’s heart under constant guard lest it be trampled under the high heels of a lady (or a gentleman, no discrimination here).

My experience with a broken heart happened about a year ago to the day.

I had just met an absolutely marvelous specimen of the female race, and we really hit it off.

Starting off as friends, we gradually progressed towards something more intense.

A few months later, she decided to go abroad for high school.

We thought we could do the whole distance thing (stop shaking your heads, it is unbecoming.).

For 8 months, it actually worked!

The real trouble started after she got back.

 

Firsts are Forever

Of course, there is no denying that distance is incredibly taxing on a relationship.

For some reason though, we seemed to have figured out how to make it work.

At least I thought so.

8 months after she left, she made her return to the country.

I was ecstatic, of course.

Throughout our time apart, we had been talking about how she wanted our “first time” to be special.

About how she couldn’t wait for it and so on and so forth.

I went along with it, because I thought I was in love with this young female.

A week after she got back though, I discovered that she had engaged in unmentionable acts, under the influence of a LOT of alcohol, with another man at a party.

Another man!

I was devastated.

 

The Edge of Damnation

The experience made me sink into a deep funk I thought I would never throw off.

After about a month of wallowing in my own misery (I broke up with her, of course), I realized that I was now extremely insecure about myself.

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According to my friends, I needed to “get laid” to get over it.

So I thought to myself, “what have I got to lose?”.

The next day (this was about 4 months after the breakup), we hunted around for some escorts.

Thankfully in Miami escorts aren’t hard to find at all.

The strange thing was, spending time with them actually helped me more than I could possibly have imagined.

Of course, it wasn’t the only factor, but it definitely contributed. With a lot of help from my closest friends and a complete delete of the little S word from all social media, I finally found myself in the clear.

It wasn’t easy.

In fact, it was a harrowing struggle.

In the end though, you learn a lot about your strengths and the true value of a heart that is whole. I am now completely happy, and don’t even think about my ex anymore.

I am with a beautiful, loving woman, and it is amazing.

The escorts, my friends and time itself gave me the confidence and determination I needed to get over this and regain my dignity.

 

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An aging Yank living in Seattle, Washington.

Gary – who has written posts on GeekandJock.