Top 5 Reasons Men Fall In Love

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Top 5 Reasons Men Fall In Love

Confused by What Men Want? Read On …

Remain an individual and beautiful woman, OK?Here’s the Top 5 things that guys will decide upon when picking a woman they’ll want to spend the rest of their lives with.

So here goes ….


1. Obvious Outer Beauty

Beauty isn’t so apparent and I’ll tell you why.

Women radiate beauty, both inside and out. The first attraction will most certainly be external beauty but that’s really just the initial bait.

Any women reading this really does need to understand they simply have to be themselves, naturally.

Hoping to capture a guy under false pretenses is a total waste of everyone’s time.

Be Real and Keep It Real, Ladies

2. Inner Beauty

To keep the guy hooked, for the long term, there is going to have to be a compatible and complimentary internal shine.

There is a general feeling amongst younger girls that they need to surrender to the testosterone fueled young bucks and end up acting ditzy, without a clue.

Long term ‘real’ guys are looking for a woman with substance.

Does any woman really think a man will want to marry an airhead?

Remain an individual and beautiful woman.

Keep your distinctiveness and who you are.

Enrich your individuality, through a combination and extension of that new man in your life.

3. Is It Sameness or Difference?

I love all the same things that he does, we’re perfect!

On the surface, thinking that the both of you are the perfect match because you are like a mirror image of him is fraught with danger. Why?

Guys are looking for comfort and an exchange of differences.

Most people are, actually.

All individuals love a certain level of challenge and exposure to new experiences.

So girls, please do ensure you’re into areas that he’s not.

You tell me
Is it better to live your own life and share it or…
…pretend to be something you’re not and live a total facade?

It could be as simple as wine tasting, netball, whatever. Those are new things he’ll interested in knowing more of and want to experience with you, as they are differences.

As an example, when I met my second wife Pam Allen, we had mutual interests in Spirituality, exercise and fitness and even a commonality in divorce and past relationships.

We also had differences in past relationship experiences, came from completely different countries and cultures.

We had lots to talk about and share as well as common goals in life.

Personally, it was like magic and we both love having experienced the vast divergence in meeting someone from another country.

This is definitely a huge reward for those couples in a long distance relationship too.

They might not know it but the agitation they withstand in the inception will serve as an attractive force and glue for many years.

4. Keep My Identity Intact

Ever heard of girlfriends literally smothering a guy?

This happens more than you think. Like most people, men also wish to retain their identities and who they are.

Start and go easy.

Guys will unconsciously be gauging the level of freedom and expression that any new gal will be giving them. While mothering is obviously strong in all females, a boyfriend isn’t a child and will certainly object to being treated as one.

Treat the guy as a man and not as a boy – though all males tend to still like their toys and gadgets :)

5. Self Esteem

Ensure you’re giving him the breathing space to have high self esteem and confidence.

But why is that so significant?

To tell the truth about guys, we do actually have a fragile ego.

Men have an inner and primal driving force when it comes to competing.

They compete in almost every aspect in their lives so self esteem and confidence are certainly highly important to their success.

Believing in a new guy’s ability tells him he has a potential partner he can trust and confide in.

Agree or Disagree? Speak Your Mind, With Your Opinion

Nice to see you made it to the end of the post. Here’s what you can do next:

  • What’s one thing you could choose to do, to get the attention and time that you deserve?
  • Have you any thoughts of whether these points will help you find and keep your next male friend?
  • Guys: Are these your top reasons?
  • Click one of the Share buttons – your friends can then enjoy this article too.

And thanks for reading too – Let us know your thoughts in the comments.

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Avatar of Martin

Martin is a down to earth, honest, quirky humor, compassionate and upfront kinda guy. Easy going and love to laugh. Into good food, wine and great company – as well as coffee. I’ll talk to almost anyone …. ok, anyone….

Martin – who has written posts on GeekandJock.


  1. wrote on March 24th, 2013 at 2:28 am

    Janis Binder

    I really like this article written on Top 5 Reasons That Men Fall In Love. Though
    I am not in a relationship it helps to know before I get in a relationship. For the most part beauty is only skin deep. Allowing your partner to be him/herself is important. Women we do sometimes give up the Diamonds on the first date.
    I use to think that maybe he would really like me if I gave him some booty first.
    When I would meet a guy who like me for me well that was hard to accept and I tried hard to break that romance up before it really got started. So now if I am to be loved I want it unconditional. I want to remember why i fell in love with him. I want us to be together but separate. Respect each other as a person and trust each other. If I can keep in mind the 5 reasons men fall in love there may be hope for me to find that special person.

    • Avatar of Martin
      wrote on March 25th, 2013 at 11:08 am


      Too true on what you say, though remember both men and women get together because of, initially, physical attraction – the real ‘us’ needs to come out and be accepted early too.
      It’s the process of making that happens on both that needs to take place and generally doesn’t – then the wheels fall off because neither party really knows the other.
      Doesn’t make sense?
      There’s your special guy waiting out there for you too – just gotta refocus your radar on him, Janis.
      Martin recently posted..Relationship Boundaries – Are You Screwing This Up Too?My Profile

  2. wrote on February 22nd, 2013 at 3:49 pm


    i just totally enjoyed this article. very well written, just bookmarked ur site.

  3. wrote on July 27th, 2012 at 7:55 am

    Tetka Rhu

    Totally enjoyed reading your thoughts and feelings on Top 5 Reasons Men Fall in Love Martin.
    As usual enlightening and what I note most from your blog is Respect for each other.
    I can only be myself at ALL times, so authenticity and acceptance of each others dreams, together with support for those dreams to be a reality (my words) is one of the reasons that stood out for me.
    One thing I know is none of us are perfect and if 2 peoples heart sing in harmony then anythings possible.
    Tetka Rhu recently posted..Days 254 to 260: Base Chakra – The ART of Living the DreamMy Profile

    • Avatar of Martin
      wrote on July 27th, 2012 at 8:42 am


      Glad you enjoyed my ramblings, Tetka and thank you too for sharing your thoughts as well.
      Interestingly, quite a lot of younger ladies fail to act true to themselves – I think I wrote this post after seeing some younger girls playing it up on the train, to catch the eye of some boys :)
      In a good relationship, respect and support are two strong pillars, definitely.
      Martin recently posted..5 Ways to Keep the Fire Ignited in Your RelationshipMy Profile

  4. wrote on May 10th, 2012 at 11:36 am

    Elena Anne

    This is really interesting and it really made me smile. As a woman, I do agree that when you’re in a relationship, you should still preserve your differences. It’s really flattering if my guy accepts me despite of me being too cheesy and mushy and so on. Also, though I’m not into football, I do respect his football marathon time and sometimes, I even try to also understand how the game works by asking him but it doesn’t mean I have to push myself hard to be a football fan too.
    Elena Anne recently posted..Soy Protein Powder SupplementsMy Profile

    • Avatar of Martin
      wrote on May 10th, 2012 at 11:57 am


      So very cool to see your comment, Elena.

      As human beings, we have our own uniqueness – qualities found in no other person on the planet. It’s vitality important we keep our identity. It’s equally OK if we choose to grow and expand that uniqueness, providing it our own decision and never based on peer pressure.

      But I had a big laugh when you mentioned football. Pam and I are the exact opposite – she loves her rugby and there at times I get up in the wee morning hours to keep her company, watching an overseas live game :)

      Great to have your visit here, at our little patch of Internet heaven.
      Martin recently posted..You Really Should Do A Guest Post For UsMy Profile

  5. wrote on May 10th, 2012 at 7:53 am


    Perfect list. I think many women, especially in their younger years, struggle with a lot of these things. For instance, most girls will try to do, be, say exactly what their guys do, be, or say. We think that if we are like them, then they will like us. Experience tells you otherwise. Thinking back on some of the things I did to try and MAKE a guy love me – OY…I cringe. Loved the guy on the video…what a smart guy and obviously a catch for any woman.

    • Avatar of Martin
      wrote on May 10th, 2012 at 8:02 am


      Yeah, being a parrot to anyone is a waste of your value and self worth.
      Though, you’ve got me so incredibly curious now, Bellaisa – what are some examples of the things you did do to make a guy love you back?

      Time to spill some beans now!
      Martin recently posted..Find and Discover True Love – Faster and EarlierMy Profile

  6. wrote on March 16th, 2012 at 4:48 pm


    It is important to have this 5 reasons so that men will fall in love with you. Being your self is one of the most important reason why men fall in love because they will know what is your true identity. Thanks for sharing different ideas you have to make men fall in love.

    • Avatar of Martin
      wrote on March 18th, 2012 at 12:01 pm


      That one really should be meant for both men and women too, Tracy.
      Everyone should be true to themselves and behave as themselves. Anything else simply creates a facade and, sometimes, a continuing lie that won't sustain any sort of a lying relationship.

      • wrote on March 23rd, 2012 at 6:26 pm


        That is totally true and I must agree with you. there may be certain times that both of us are not being honest to ourself and we end up hating each other. Why don’t we ask our self in making fall in the palm of our hands.

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