You can cut or strenghten chakra cords depending on your relationship situation

To Know and Not to Do is Not to Know – Dr. Stephen R. Covey

Happiness comes in some strange packages but more on that at the end of this post.

I’ve spoken before about my marriage full of deception and lies and dishonesty.

It’s a heart breaking reality to face up to that you’ve lived within someone else deceitful world that you thought was actually love.

A punch in the guts and a shock to anyone’s belief system that such evil intentions exist in this world.

But do you know the final piece to the puzzle?

Knowing hell is discovering your true heaven
Hell and Heaven are partners in your life.



Even after the separation, the mind games and lies continued.

  • Barefaced fabrications of not even knowing my address
  • Using her own son to seed information to my son
  • Sending me a short iPhone email ‘by mistake’
    • Do you know how impossible it is to ‘accidentally’ send a new email to the wrong person whose name is unlike any of the intended recipients?
  • The list is far longer but you get the idea

While I admit I can’t understand the agendas or reasoning that goes on inside her head, I’ve now gotten to the point of forgiveness and I’m grateful to her, for the learnings these silly games have taught me.


The Rock Journey

I was fortunate to be recommended towards Reiki Healing, in my path to purge years of what many others see as subtle mind-control and manipulative behaviour, from someone I honestly trusted and loved.

The process itself was indeed one of liberation and during the session, I saw her in a light of forgiveness – from me to her.

This, oddly enough, came from the power of mindful visualisations, through crystals.

The technique which was recommended to me and I used was visualising her and myself surrounded by the cleansing power of white and gold light.

I saw the threads, strands and cords I understood that connected us.

This was about decoupling and dissolving them and giving gratitude and forgiveness – release, forgive, move to the positive and be empowered to move on.

All the things I needed to do, to reclaim my own power and positive life-force which had been slowly sucked from my soul.

The Black Obsidian crystal was my key.

Meditation, mindset and gratitude time.


Decouple and Dissolve

Thick cords joined torso, mind and heart.

Thin ones intertwined as well from our auras.

Mind Cords

  • I don’t claim to understand why you’d lock me into a mental box of darkness, for almost half our marriage.

    'i hope you are the one to make her think differently martin she needs to smell the roses' - Husband #2 - 16 years before me

    • You’ve done it before to Husband No. 2 and albeit to the two others
    • You’re obviously not even aware of the impact of such actions on another human being that only wants mutual love and respect.

It’s been dissolved and lay on the ground of white and gold.

I can only forgive you and send you gratitude for the lesson I needed to learn and grow from.

Torso Cords

  • Half our marriage consisted of my being locked in a mental box. Well, the lack of basic human and relationship intimacy extended for an even greater period.
    • Including 7 months of this solitude prior to our separation
    • You know full well the ramification of this on a man and husband
    • Especially one seeking only love from you and return it

That cord too is now in a melted pool.

Heart Cord

As much as I visualised the dissolving of the connected heart cord, it remained.

It was the last remainder, despite several of my meditation / visualisation sessions. I saw it in my waking sleep.

While thin, it remained connected in my visions.

…. Until I did the step of doing and to then know

I picked up the phone, made a number of phone calls, one of them being to my Family Law solicitor.

The Heart Cord simply dropped from my heart, in my mind’s eye. Thank you!


The Final Cord Dissolved

I now have a wonderful anouncement to make, though to some it might sound a little bizzarre.

It is with great pleasure that I announce the countdown to the official divorce of

Martin James Cooney


Pamela Nicolette Allen

is now in motion. Fuller understanding of responsibilities, rights and my future path.



Rightful Passage and Transitions

All cords and connections lay in a pool of gratitude, surrounded by white and gold.

I simply forgive you.

I am learning to just be grateful to you, for the experiences you have given and taught me and the learnings that I needed.

I hope you find whatever it is that you think your happiness is.

The End …. The Beginning.

Happiness Comes in Some Strange Packages 1

Enjoying newly found freedoms in South-East Asia, Martin is a down to earth, honest, quirky humor, compassionate and upfront kinda guy. Easy going and love to laugh. Into good food, wine and great company. I’ll talk and try to help anyone.
Drop me a message and let’s start there, OK?

Martin Cooney – who has written posts on GeekandJock.

10 thoughts on “Happiness Comes in Some Strange Packages”
  1. Beautiful work Martin.

    Probably the most elegant piece of writing I have ever read in regard to such an otherwise painful experience.
    I think it’s great that you have been living a life of rediscovery – and I wish you nothing but the very best my friend :)

    1. Thanks heaps Dana.
      Yeah the crystals and the cords was an interesting experience, for me anyway.
      The forgiveness and gratitude is a habit I carry with me these as well and was the final piece of the puzzle to let go of everything associated with all this.

      It’s been a real buzz of a journey since, so the saying of ‘One door closes and a shitload more open’ is so true :)

  2. Nice post

    I feel very sad to hear your story. I wonder is relation ship such a big problem in ones life. I thought being in a relation ship would be awesome feeling and life would become more beautiful. May be the truth is a bit far from it. I don’t know much about relationship as i never been until now. I guess hooking up with the right person is all what matters.

    When coming to forget somebody , i guess it is not too easy. I knew one of my friend who was always depressed after his girl friend broke up with him. I tried to console in many ways but he was always thinking of her. Is this thing such a big headache. So i feel being single is the best thing in life.

    Thanks for sharing.

    1. Thanks for the comment, Sagar.
      Yeah, well, it was one of the saddest parts of my life to discover my wife, Pam Allen, hadn’t been interested in working on our marriage since it almost started. A long drawn out number of years of diversion and untruths. That is the sad part that a person can even lie to themselves but that is life.
      I’ve moved on from that dark period now which is reflected in this post. Leave the BS behind you is the only option.
      But having a real relationship with someone that DOES WANT love and happiness is still worthwhile. That is something is still believe in and will work towards.
      One rotten apple doesn’t mean all the fruit of life is bad. Remember that.

  3. Thank you so much for this process. As I said earlier in the year in the forums, my wife sounded like such the same troubled type of woman as yours did. well, we have split as I couldn’t take the mental abuse and the stupid games that she played like yours did. It was like looking into your mirror.
    i don’t understand it. thank you anyway for some process to follow to extract myself from my own thoughts of dispair.

    1. Yeah, to be blunt, Jarred, that writing was on the wall too unfortunately, from our private chats, huh?
      There’s a vast difference between an outwardly appearing kind heart and a honestly inner kind heart to those that love you – same for outwardly appearing caring to interpersonal caring and nuturing – yours and others failed on that score and it’s the harsh reality we both must face, grow from, give gratitude to, forgive and move on to a far better life.

      You can try and seek and assistance from her family and friends but I’ll guess you’ll hit the same kind of brick wall as I did. Those sorts of friends are totally gutless in being unbiased and wanting to help you both as their loyalties lay NOT with you, in any way. Mistake I made.

      I mean, here’s a direct email quote from Reza (Tweety) Dove in South Africa who was my brother-in-law “I do know that Pam is stubborn and very much a close book! This unfortunately is not good for anything let alone marriage.”

      Now you’d think that people knowing that and she’s had three other failed short marriages that someone would wake her up to smell the roses (as Husband #2 said to me), wouldn’t you? Nope, the poisoning runs far deeper which is why unless your wife can wake up out of her own fog, it’s time to move on, Jarred.

      And it’s a frigging bitter pill to swallow too but this process helped me tremendously. Ping me privately if you need a Skype Chat too, mate.

      1. Hey, thanks for the Skype chat last week, Martin.
        It helped a bit in thinking differently but I just can’t get Kim out of my head. I still bloody love her despite to crap she’s handed me up over the last 2 years. This is just so depressing.
        I’m getting into meditation and that is helping me when I’m doing it. not much when i’m not lol
        i’ve given up on her friends or relations, what was a bust for me too. people are so gullible.
        i was more interested in your journey without Pam and what your head is like? this shit is so common, i just don’t believe it. my head is outta control some nights

        1. As I said during our Skype, Jarred, you need to fully focus on you and not Kim. It is a huge challenge in thinking the entire relationship was a total sham but that’s the reality of it all. Keep doing your regular meditations and the cord breaking. It does get easier and I understand the strangle hold these sorts of people can have – I still have pangs of love towards Pam but that’s the process of it all. When those feelings arise within you, do another cord decoupling session.

          Kim’s friends and family don’t know her like you did. That type of crap was always thrown in my face, on a regular basis. As for family, and an example, there’s this guy called Phil from Sydney – I thought he was unbiased and wanted to help our relationship but in reality, he was just pussy-whipped by his wife and a total Kool-Aid drinker. What a limp-dick who just did what he was told to do and continues to do the same. Lemmings :)

          Thing is, do your own research on this as there is no-one else who will know a person than their partner who shares the same bed. It’s an often used diversion that sociopaths use to deflect attention away from themselves and onto you as being the one at fault.

          My journey will be taking a significant shift in a few weeks too. Apprehensive and joyful on future plans so will tell you about in our next Skype. You might like to take part too but will chat with you on the what, why and when, OK?

  4. I love that first pic, Martin and it says it all.
    I struggled as well through my first few boyfriends and it was so very tough to get over. I never thought I would see the light of day as I’m sure I thought too so wonderful to see what you’ve been doing to overcome the adversity of your own hell.
    I didn’t know about crystals before reading this but whatever can get you to forget and forgive such a terrible time in your life then it can only be a good thing, huh?
    God Bless

    1. That came to me from another commenter actually Bella and it stuck. Says volumes about the past as well as the path forward, for me anyway.
      Love can be cruel and kind, if you’ve got the same mindset. Sadly for me ….

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