So What Is the Average Sex Duration?

I was doing some research the other day into healthy relationship counseling areas and, as I tend to do, I got sidetracked with the question of ‘How Long Does Sex Usually Last?‘.

Well, it turns out the average sex duration might surprise you as it did me. Read on.

average sex duration might be shorter than some think

The average sex duration might be shorter than some think :)

It’s one of those age-old sex relationship questions that I think we all dwell on, from time to time.


Porn Studs Are Pretenders

You always see these porn studs and starlets going at it for what seems like hours, in porn movies.

This sort of thing, while interesting to spice up a consenting couples’ passion life, has a less than satisfactory outcome of influencing a man’s (and perhaps a woman’s) idea that their sexual capacity might be wanting.

It’s important to realize those porn movies are a total fantasy world and has little to do with real life.


What Sex Therapists Have To Say

A survey of sex therapists and counselors last May 2009 which was published in the Journal of Sexual Medicine, suggested that there’s an optimal timeframe for sexual intercourse.

Whether you believe it or not, it’s between 3 and 13 minutes. According to these so-called scientists, the average time for intercourse is between 3 and 7 minutes and an ‘ideal’ period would last 7 to 14 minutes.

[Can You Have Too Much Sex As Well?]


Seven To Fourteen Minutes?

Now obviously, these figures are just for the intercourse (i.e. actual thrusting) part of the lovemaking episode.

Being a man, it’s important to ensure we all engage in both the foreplay as well as the cuddling – you know, the before and after parts of the sex act.

The ladies certainly appreciate both foreplay and certainly cuddling.

That doesn’t mean it always has to be lengthy foreplay and cuddling – if it’s mutual, foreplay can be anything from 1 second to 30 minutes or more.

The same goes for the after intercourse cuddling – guys need to be alert to how the woman is feeling or mood.

Oftentimes, you’re both tired or relaxed, and nodding off to sleep in each others’ arms just seems natural.

Just be aware that women are sometimes geared up after sex whereas guys have an inbuilt chemical reaction that makes them sleepy – this is the age-old challenge where the ladies complain about guys being uninterested after sex and just wanting to go to sleep.

Keep this in mind.

Now without keeping an egg timer beside your bed, does this research of 7 to 14 minutes of ‘ideal’ intercourse ring true with you?


Speak Your Mind, With Your Opinion

Nice to see you made it to the end of the post. Here’s what you can do next:

  • Is that in the ballpark that you thought?
  • Should any of us really be overly worried about timing?

And thanks for reading too – Let us know your thoughts in the comments.

Just How Long Does Sex Actually Take? 1

Enjoying newly found freedoms in South-East Asia, Martin is a down to earth, honest, quirky humor, compassionate and upfront kinda guy. Easy going and love to laugh. Into good food, wine and great company. I’ll talk and try to help anyone.
Drop me a message and let’s start there, OK?

Martin Cooney – who has written posts on GeekandJock.