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Sounds more like you're at some crossroads than she is.
She's evolving and still young. And given women are 3-5 years more mature than guys, she isn't that much younger than you, as far as maturity levels go. So age isn't really the issue.
You love her. She has dreams but I guess you don't since you're happy living your life in the military – is that a dead end job too or something else?
Do you two have any mutual dreams and aspirations or are you putting this all on her so you can cut loose and disappear?