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Martin
Keymaster
Post count: 250

Hi Sara – thanks for visiting.
I needed to move your reply to a new topic since it would be confusing for others following the conversation you had replied in. Hope that's cool.

Ahh, those differences between men and women being compounded by the lack of touch and presence with one another. I know that feeling oh too well, Sara.

And funnily enough, it sounds like the same issues that Pam and I went through so you're certainly not alone in your situation being unique.

Many women think and read things into situations that aren't really there. Your guy ‘sounds' like a pragmatic one. Here's some really good initial advice:

[1] Tell him what you've told us i.e. how you think and dwell on incidental statements and ponder on the permutations. What your differences seem to be in various things and why. It's important you both have a solid and transparent understanding of each others' values and actions.

I certainly went through this same process with Pam who was living in Cape Town, when we met. Quite a challenging time. We talked for hours every day and eventually gained huge insights in each others' behaviour.

[2] That chill pill needs to be taken daily :) Certainly do get involved in your own interests, to take your mind off things. Exercise is good for that and you'll get your endorphins pumping as well.

[3] Have you done a list and imagined what your future life looks like? Share this and modify, with your guys' input. You'll both gain insights on the other.

There's other stuff but how are we tracking with these initial thoughts? Making some sense? Have anything further to add or ask?