the constant flow of life's lessons

Relationships – They Ebb and Flow For a Reason

we are just sand on the beach of life
We are just sand on the beach of life

Think back on all the people you no longer have anything to do with now.

There’s probably quite a few, if you’re anything like me.

You once had the best of friends and some of them are no longer active in your lives, despite the strong bonds you had back in the day.

Now place yourself back in one of those times and look forward to see all the new people that are now in your life.

When it comes to relationships and people, there’s this other sort of balance we rarely give any mind to.


The Balance of Purpose

We might be at the top of the food chain but when it comes to maintaining strong bonds and ties ‘to and from’ the people we hold in our hearts, that’s very much a finite number.

  • Think of Ebb and Flow as ‘Life’s Timing’.
  • Synchronicity.
  • Universal Abundance.

Nothing in life is coincidence.

Everything happens for a reason, though most of us will be blind to the WHY.

We’re all here to learn lessons in growth.


Relationships End and Begin Anew

The cycle begins from what we learn as youngsters.

Parents can only teach you relationship foundations, from their experiences.

But since we’re all wired differently to our loving parents, our lessons are going to be different.

The Dating Cycle begins – we have to start somewhere and begin the acts of discovery.

The friend bonds start with those we resonate with, for the current lessons we’re neck-deep in – they’ll either stay because they’re needed or they’ll leave since they’re not.

It just is.


Same Goes for Intimacy – The Learning Cycle

The dating lessons are usually the toughest to learn since there’s so much deep emotional scarring, usually. It’s still a great lesson in humility as well as success.


I still remember the pain from my first ‘serious’ dating relationship when we broke up.

I honestly had thoughts of ending it all. I was unable to get her out of my head. The friends I had then we an absolute blessing in that time. I coped with their support.

And the ebb and flow was, even then, at work.

Those best of friends I no longer see as I have new best friends helping me in my current situation.


Heartbreak Is Good?

  • I learnt lessons in not being a total dickhead when it comes to people, in general – I learnt that, eventually.
  • I learnt the characteristics of women that I liked and some I didn’t like, so much.
  • I learnt about sharing.
  • I learnt that the experience of sex is vastly different for women than it was for men.
  • I learnt I wasn’t the most important person in the universe – most young people will eventually learn this tough lesson once their brain’s mature.
  • I learnt friends will pick a side and only one.
  • I learnt about forgiveness.
  • I learnt life is worth living for.
  • I learnt there’s many more fish in the sea and people are wonderful to experience and be around since everyone is a mentor, in some way.

Life’s Timing.


Speak Your Mind, With Your Opinion

Nice to see you made it to the end of the post. Here’s what you can do next:

  • What’s your own ebb and flow been like?
  • Do you have a lesson learnt from your first serious relationship?
  • Click one of the Share buttons – your friends can then enjoy this article too.

And thanks for reading too – Let us know your thoughts in the comments.

Relationships - They Ebb and Flow For a Reason 1

Enjoying newly found freedoms in South-East Asia, Martin is a down to earth, honest, quirky humor, compassionate and upfront kinda guy. Easy going and love to laugh. Into good food, wine and great company. I’ll talk and try to help anyone.
Drop me a message and let’s start there, OK?

Martin Cooney – who has written posts on GeekandJock.

8 thoughts on “Relationships – They Ebb and Flow For a Reason”
    1. Glad you liked it, Papanseo.
      Now give me a little more information about what it was that you found ‘nice’ or interesting. Comments are much more beneficial for everyone when you can open up and share a little.
      Go on, you’ll like it :)

  1. You have laid it all out in a very impressive manner and that is just so true about relationships and people who come and go in our lives. However at times I do not understand the purpose of some people in my life who would only cause me trouble. Thanks for the share.

    1. Ever thought they were there to teach you how to deal with difficult people? :)
      Maybe even how to get rid of those types of people from your life and concentrate on those that bring real value?

  2. Nice post!!! Each and every relationship enters our life to teach us something important in life. The key, definitely is to live with the relationship till the time the level of comfort is there, otherwise there is no point hanging in a relationship, just for the sake of it. The post is indeed worth an applause. Thanks for the share.

    1. Glad you enjoyed it, Aayna.
      Thinking back, have you seen this sort of thing happen in your own life and relationships with people that you no longer see?

  3. Very nice post!

    I’m sure we’ve all noticed that the more you try to hang on to a relationship (or anything else for that matter), the more it eludes you.

    All relationships have something valuable to teach us – even if what we learn is what we don’t want in the next one.

    1. It’s the big Universal Plan in play – if only I could see what’s written there, I’d be much happier, Dana :)
      Not really, more in knowing that people are part of your plan is a good thing.
      I used a lot of what I screwed up in previous relationships to better shape the following ones – sometimes it worked and sometimes not. Always learning, I guess.

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