Think of the big picture when it comes to business as well as personal relationships. Don't sweat the small stuff

I was told the majority of guys are control freaks – do you believe that?

My second ex-wife, Pam Allen (who incidentally turned out to be a control freak lol), and I were out the other night at the local club when a neighbor in our beachside apartment complex spotted us and wandered over.

It was certainly welcome as he’s a really nice guy and you might not have picked this up but I love to have a good chat which he also does ☺

He was telling me a story of his friend who, despite being a university professor, lacks even the most basic of relationship common sense as well as being a ‘control freak’.

The story went that this friend of his, let’s call him Fred, always big-noted himself in front of women and went into the ‘take charge’ mode.


Here’s a Fred example

Fred was out on a first date with Wendy.

They were having a few quite ‘get to know you’ drinks.

I never want to see your fu**ing face again. Goodnight!

Fred needed to take a leak and excused himself for a moment to attend to business. While Fred was busy shaking the dew off the lily, Wendy was visited by the attentive bartender who took her empty glass away along with Fred’s glass that had about half an inch of booze in the bottom.

Can you see where this is going?

Fred got back and went into a heavy spin. He even collared the bartender demanding WTF was he thinking, taking his glass away when he wasn’t finished.

Can you guess what Wendy’s reaction was? ☺

Wendy politely asked Fred to drive her home.

And when Wendy was out of Fred’s car, she quietly whispered the following sweet words to Fred ‘I never want to see your fu**ing face again. Goodnight!’.

Ahhh yes, sweet words indeed. Fred supposedly repeats these same relationship issues time and time again.


So what’s the problem?

Failure to recognize areas of potential improvement within yourself.

Along my travels, I’m amazed by people who coast along with their life.

Content in the 9 to 5, quick beer after work, mow the grass on Saturday with a Sunday afternoon nap, and ready again for Monday.

Sure, there’s a basic necessity for income, yet, a great many people go no further once the basic needs are catered for.


What should Fred be doing?

If he took the trouble in recognizing that having Wendy tell him to fuck off was a problem, he should be at least determining why it happened and what he can do to improve and stop it from occurring in the future.

Questions like:

  • ‘What would a first date be looking for in a partner
  • ‘Should I yell and scream in front of a woman because 12 cents of booze was mistakenly taken away?’
  • ‘Should I be acting from a space of honesty, integrity, and openness and if that’s not the case, what should I do to make that happen?’


Business Reflects Life

You cannot get what you’ve never had unless you’re willing to do what you’ve never done! Don’t be that control freak guy!

Just as importantly, your business life also reflects your personal convictions and beliefs and I know you all know that too.

Without personal reflection and development of Fred’s character traits, how do you think his business activities are panning out? That’s right, control freak bosses rarely get far.

Control Freak - Will 12 Cents of Beer Destroy a Relationship? 1

Enjoying newly found freedoms in South-East Asia, Martin is a down to earth, honest, quirky humor, compassionate and upfront kinda guy. Easy going and love to laugh. Into good food, wine and great company. I’ll talk and try to help anyone.
Drop me a message and let’s start there, OK?

Martin Cooney – who has written posts on GeekandJock.

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