Philippines girl on beach

How to Find a Philippines Girl

I’ve lived in the Philippines for over Five years.

Philippines beauty
Natural Philippines beauty also includes it’s lovely ladies too

I’ve married a Filipina girl and now have two children, with a third on the way.

In addition to my own experience, I’ve also watched dozens of relationships between Filipina girls and Western men unfold.

I’ve seen many wonderful relationships form, as well as relationships that have crashed and burned. I have many pieces of advice that can help you find the right girl, if you’re interested in a relationship with a Pinay girl.

The following experiences I’m going to share with you may shock you enough to make you think twice about finding a Filipina girl.

However, be aware that you can avoid these pitfalls with the right advice.

I’ll give you the pointers you need to avoid these traps later in the article.

Watch Out for the Pimps

I’ll start with myself.

Philippines older woman
Does she look like a Philipina Profit Centre?
Well, she is

Even when things go really well, some things can go very wrong. In my case, there is a very common situation that exists with Filipinas who are looking for foreign men. Many girls do not have access to computers and regular internet connections.

They often will have some older woman pretend to be them in contacting foreigners on their behalf. The older woman’s incentive for doing this?

They receive half of the money you send the girl.


Yes it’s shocking, and it is common. I know of several situations where this was the case, my own included. It is important to take note that in the Filipino mindset, it is not shocking. The girls end up finding a man they wouldn’t have otherwise found.

They appreciate the situation, and don’t mind losing half the money their man sends.

Half is better than nothing, right?

They keep this a secret of course, because their man might not approve.

I only found out long after being married.

You’re HOW old?

Other issues arise with age.

Here is a true story.

My wife and I typically will entertain foreigner men who come to date our friends or family. On one such occasion, a Canadian arrived and we all went out to a nearby island. On the boat ride out to the island, the girl and her foreigner were cuddling.

She was sitting in his lap, they were hugging and kissing.

Romance was full steam ahead with the couple.

It was a pleasant day at the beach, and then we all headed back.

A few weeks later I heard of an issue they were having. The guy wanted to send her money, but she couldn’t pick it up from Western Union. They were trying to figure out another family member who could receive the money. I asked, why can’t she pick the money up?

The answer: they will only give money if you are 18 or over. Confused, I asked the girl’s age. She was (drum roll) 15 years old.


I asked “Does he know that?” No, he thinks she’s 18. Luckily, nothing happened to him. However, this is a very serious thing. Go watch a few episodes of “Locked Up Abroad” on Discovery Channel and find one that features a Philippines jail if the previous story doesn’t raise the hair on the back of your neck.

Dating websites don’t let girls sign up if they’re under 18.

If a girl happens to be younger than that and wants to sign up anyways – they will. Many Filipino families would be thrilled to pawn off their 15 year old daughter to speed up her becoming the goose that lays golden eggs. I’m aware of many instances of underage girls looking for guys. It is a common enough occurrence to warrant being extra careful if a girl’s profile says “18”.

In addition, think of how silly you would feel if you visited a girl, went back home and started processing paperwork to bring her home, and at the last moment it all falls apart because she lied about her age.

Lesbian Scammers

There are a very high percentage of Filipina girls who are lesbians that pursue men online – for no other purpose than to milk them for money.

Filipina lesbians
Moral of the story: Don’t get caught with your pants down with the wrong type of Filipina girls

From my experience, I’ve seen this destroy a few men’s lives. A large group of lesbians I’m aware of through family relations all have profiles online. When one of the girls gets a guy to send money, the group of them go partying at the local disco.

In one case I’m aware of, a guy from California came here to marry a girl.

Up until that point, the man was being used for money. After he arrived to marry her, her family put enormous pressure on her to get married. They would receive a lot of money if she married a foreigner. She however, didn’t want to – but she did anyways. On their honeymoon, she eloped with her lesbian lover, leaving both her new husband and her family behind. He stayed in the Philippines longer to work the situation out, spending all of his money.

He ended up losing his job over it.

Since then I’ve kept my eye on this girl’s attempts to scam and have rescued another guy from her clutches before it was too late.

This is just one of a few lesbian horror stories I could share.

There is no better career available to a young girl than to hook a foreigner man.

Average wages over here for an inexperienced young girl may be $100 USD per month for a full time job. If you send her $400, that may seem like “not much” to you, but to them it is four month’s salary for doing nothing. If she can float 3 other guys just like you, then she just made a full year’s salary for doing nothing more than pretending she likes you a few hours here-and-there. It is a tempting situation for girls who are not actually serious in finding a man and don’t have much of a conscience.

For that matter, married women or girls with boyfriends also scam men, with no intention of leaving their Filipino men.

There are countless situations that could unfold which place you in a situation of being used. However, if you do due diligence, you can find a Filipina girl that makes everything worth while.

Reasons to Find a Filipina Girl

Not all Filipina girls are bad news.

A disproportionate amount of girls on dating websites are scammers. In regular Philippines society, they are much fewer. In a bit I will explain how to stay away from the bad apples. In the meantime, let me explain a few things about Filipina girls as wives.

The first issue is the age-gap.

It is quite common for a foreigner to be from 15 to 30 years older than her Filipina girl.

You may find yourself asking, is that normal? At first, I wouldn’t believe it was possible. However, from all I’ve seen and experienced, this type of age gap is not a deal breaker. I won’t go so far as to say it doesn’t matter, though. In a very real, practical sense – you are bringing things to the table, and the girl is bringing things to the table.

She is bringing her youth, beauty and dedication to being a good wife or girlfriend.

You are bringing stability and providing a lifestyle above and beyond she would ever experience if she settled on most Filipino men. It would be infinitely naive to think that a Filipina girl who is 15 to 30 years younger than you would consider it equitable if you are unable to provide either stability or an improvement in lifestyle.

Now don’t get me wrong, I’m not painting all Filipina girls out to be gold diggers.

However, you need to be a provider. Her family will need a little assistance now and then. She may want children, and have them go to college. She may wish to go to college herself. This is your responsibility (not only in their opinion, but in mine as well). If you are barely making ends meet as-is, you have no business looking for a Filipina girl – it will not end well.

So in answering this question about age: Will a Filipina girl truly love you even if you are 15 to 30 years older?

The answer is a conditional yes.

If you are bringing what you are supposed to bring to the table, she will have no issues bringing what she needs to as well.

One last caution about age, however.

If you find yourself an 18 to 20 year old, you are then dealing with an 18 to 20 year old girl’s mentality. If you are 50, that mentality is going to be enormously different than your own on many issues. This is not exclusively a Filipina issue. Any 20 year old girl you find from any nationality would have the same maturity issues. The older of a girl you find, the more likely she is to be more mature.

The Filipino society is very conservative. Girls here desire traditional families. It is certainly ok for a man to be a man and a woman to be a woman.

One of the best reasons to find a Filipina girl (at least in my opinion), is that relations with the right girl are permanent.

There is no divorce in the Philippines.

It is not in their mindset that once married, that finding another man is even an option. It is NOT an option. People go to jail in the Philippines for adultery.

Recently I was reading about a story of a Brit who went into hiding, and had to bribe his way out of the country, in order to avoid a seven year jail sentence because the woman he slept with was already married.

Does that scare you?

Then perhaps a Filipina girl isn’t for you. Personally, I think it is one of their best traits.

How to Avoid Being Scammed

Here is my advice for finding a Filipina girl the right way.

By following these rules, you can limit your risk and avoid many potential problems.

First of all, do not contact any Filipina girls until you’ve set the date you can come to the Philippines.

Give yourself up to two months.

No longer than two months.

Once you know the date you can come, join any of the many romance websites that have Filipinas. They will contact you. When I joined, I received around 150 contacts the first week.

Having girls to choose from will not be a problem.

This next part will be hard, but you HAVE to do it!

Do NOT become romantically involved with any of them.

Become friends with many.

You will let these girls know you’re looking for a girlfriend or wife. However, you will say you cannot become romantically involved with someone you have never met.

They must know when you come to the Philippines that you will be meeting her, as well as many other girls. She will not become jealous or think that’s weird, because you are only friends with her!

Tell her that you will select your girl after meeting with them in person.

This kills so many birds with one stone.

  • They won’t ask for or expect money.
    • Why would they get money from you when they are just a friend, and you are considering many other girls?
  • This works for you psychologically.
    • If they realize they have competition to win you, they consider you more appealing.
  • They behave.
    • They haven’t “won” you yet.
    • It teaches a girl to not be spoiled or think they can get away with anything, and it works in your favor.
  • You can’t be scammed if you don’t send money.
    • If they are only out for money, they will be less likely to keep up a charade if they know they won’t get any.
  • When you are in “friend looking for a wife” mode, you can get away with stuff that is much more difficult than when you’re already committed.
    • You can be nonchalant about asking for her birth certificate, or to prove any particular thing, without seeming distrusting. “I’m sorry, this is a list of things I have to ask all girls.
    • Every girl I’m meeting has to answer these questions.” This way you are not singling her out in mistrust.
  • It is ok to exclude a girl and being wrong for doing so.
    • You don’t have to prove your gut instincts!
    • If she looks a little too preoccupied while chatting with her, it doesn’t matter if she’s chatting with other guys or other girl friends of hers – if it makes you feel uncomfortable, move on to the next girl.
    • Filipina girls wanting foreign men outweigh foreign men wanting Filipina’s many times over, you have a large selection and can afford to be extra picky.

It’s called playing “hard to get”.

It works.

Now, while these girls are your friend, here are the red flags you need to be looking out for. These red flags disqualify them, if they do these things then forget them and move on to the next girl!

  1. They won’t introduce you to many friends or family. Filipina girls have HUGE families. If after talking with them for a week or two, you’ve only heard of one, two or none of them – this is a red flag. If they won’t introduce you to their family, perhaps they are hiding their activities from their family. The only reason they would do that is if they are scamming guys.
  2. If you catch them in a lie. Any lie, big or small, is enough to disqualify a girl.
  3. Be on the lookout for anything fishy. If you’re chatting with her online and she suddenly has to go with no explanation (perhaps another guy came online she needs to talk to). Trust your gut instinct every time.

Finally, write a list of what is important to you.

Stay true to your list.

  • Do you not want to have children?
    • Mention it to the girl before you get serious.
    • Ask if it is ok.
  • Do it before you’re romantically involved.
  • Do you want to live in the US?
  • Move to the Philippines?
  • Be a traveling vagabond?

Discuss sex expectation, not in a dirty way but in a “After we are in a committed relationship, married, etc. … I think we should have sex this often, what is your opinion?

What about when you’re pregnant (if you decide to have children)?

Have it all in writing, and discuss it with each girl. These types of discussions are far easier to have before you are romantically involved.

The reason you do this is because they are mostly all pretty. Pretty faces are easy to fall in love with. However, once that novelty wears off, you have to deal with this girl’s temperament and habits. Some of the advice I recommended above, I didn’t do (I sent money). However, having my list of important things and discussing it with each girl is one of the things I did do – and I’m so glad I did.

Living in the Philippines has been an awesome experience.

I may write another huge article explaining my move to the Philippines, how my career changed and how I make money living here.

Speak Your Mind, With Your Opinion

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How to Find a Philippines Girl, The Safe and Right Way 1

One of the websites I market is Vibrator Gifts. Its a sex toys website where I have various adult products reviewed. Adult marketing is one of the many types of businesses I engage in. I also do website design, PHP programming and web automation. Thanks for reading!

Kevin – who has written posts on GeekandJock.

125 thoughts on “How to Find a Philippines Girl, The Safe and Right Way”
  1. ,one should be individual in deciding about person
    Hear Hear.

    Hello from Ireland.
    You say no divorce in philippines. But there is anullment.
    My story. I’m 60. Around april 2018, Answered an ad in pen pal section of irish magazine. Filipino lady looking for someone who will accept her and her family. Thought she lived in ireland, as it was posted in an irish magazine. No. Turned out an ad was posted by the irish husband of a friend of hers living in ireland. She is in her fifties.
    So the good things i did according to your rules.
    I. I told her straight away I was unemployed.
    2. She was married, but got anulled over 25 years ago, 4 grown up children. I got to know not to only her, but her offspring through facebook messenger txting and videocalls. I also met cousins, her parents, other relatives.
    The bad things i did.
    1. It was only last December that I went to the philippines to meet her in person. I also met 3 of her children. Unfortunately I couldn’t afford to travel to where her oldest son lived.
    She does not want any more children and I am happy to go with her wishes.
    Not sure if you consider or bad. After about two months, we declared our love for each other. Googled online about this sort of thing. Hmm, love doesn’t work like that. It’s just infatuation. I felt the same when i met her. I still love/am infatuated by her.
    I guess you could say i am one of those people who has no business
    I have sent her lots of money.

    I’m not cheap or stingy, but when she mentioned she was an orphan I thought t myself…perfect…no family to worry about to send money or sibling to help send through college or older family member that would need future medical bills paid.
    So being too good to be true, I was suspicious.
    She did not ask for money at first but told me she had visited the US on a tourist visa. That it had expired recently and that she had to renew it soon in order to not have to show tons of money on bank accounts and not pay for the entire process starting from scratch. She send me copies of her passport and the Visa and looked soooo genuine. I flt compelled to get her visa renewed so she could come here in just a matter of weeks. I was so excited and looking forward to her getting the visa approves. Long story short, she send me a list of requirements, and I send her money to take care of all the medical exams, police clearance, etc…she showed me proof of everything paid, even of the interview appointment at the embassy. She got approved and was ready to travel and needed the pocket money and money for an expensive roundtrip ticket, which according to her had to be bought at an agency and not online so she needed that money! But then she said she went to claim the visa at the embassy…which I read is not common practice, since it’s mailed and delivered via a special courier. So I called the embassy and they verified my suspicion…her name never showed up on the interview appointment system nor was it possible for her to claim the visa the following day at the embassy. It was a hard blow because she showed me official looking receipts and passport and visa.
    So I ended conversation with her. But guess what? Two weeks later I met from another province…you guessed it…a young beautiful orphan nurse that had her visa recently expired!!! And send a copy of her expired visa! What in the world!!!
    Unless it’s the weirdest coincidence in the world..It seems this scam is being used now broadly…please be aware…it is sooo tempting to fall for these apparent perfect girls…educated, sweet, beautiful, no family and so easy to bring back home…please be aware of this new scam!

    1. i was going to start up a Marriage site and do it right. Chaperoned meetings etc. and charge large for it – i spend easily $5-7K per trip and i have been here 28 x so whats that worth to find a woman that i have now from province and is real? its priceless. I would pay $20K if there were guarantees – which there can never be. Anyway – it would be far to time consuming to have it done properly. and I would need to charge $10K to set up 10 women to meet and 3 finally to meet for 3 dates all chaperoned and most likely there would be airfares and hotels for her and her chaperone (ate (aunti) which the fellow would have to cover. Girls all would need to be checked by us, barangay and friends and relitives would be contacted and met with – u see the time and money it would take to travel to the small villages and houses in the middle of nowhere – where the innocent and good girls live – so there goes that business…… i prefer online sales. Hands off. but i wish someone would actually do somethng about the scammers and BS that goes along with the poverty. I know a woman who is married with 5 kids – she lies on line says single no kids, husband looks after the kids while shes on cam with men who send her money – she has 4 bf most of the time, and yes does things on cam for the guys – husband watches. Guys come and visit – she goes off with them to boracay or palawan for a week or 2….husband is there when she returns. It pays well…they don’t mind. She has some fun and travels to hotels, she tells him everything when she returns – including pics – then they have sex. true story – a small town west of Cebu city. nice huh? scams everywhere guys – everywhere.

  3. I enjoyed the article. I have been voted the representative for the family in finding a bride for my brother who is 48. We are a traditional family and feel strongly about the formality of courtship. We also would like to make sure my amazing, kind, handsome and wonderful brother (I’m the youngest of 11 and Danny and I were the last) finds a woman who truly deserves him. Any suggestions on where to meet REAL ladies…He is 48 and not interested in young girls…just a loving, devoted and loyal wife who will go on adventures with him (motorcycle, fishing,exploring the world). I am also single (single mom of two boys and I am 47) but Danny says no one in the world could ever possibly deserve me (see how he is)…If you could just point me in the right direction…? Kindest Regards, L.

    1. Hi Lynnette. I have been on and off dating websites for many years and find it very hit and miss. There are so many scam sites and scam people out there. Even if you find a site without photoshopped pics or ones where 40 year olds look like 20 year olds it is very hard. Most genuine looking sites charge large amounts of money to talk, write, get contact details etc. I am from UK but have been living in China for over 8 years, working as a teacher and doing some business and lately having finished an 8 year relationship I went back online only to find it was worse. How to find a genuine woman without going bankrupt? So I have decided to open my own site. It will start Feb 2019 and ‘foreigners’ that is anyone not Asian or living outside China will not need to pay to join and search for a potential partner. There will be advice sections and guidelines on the site as well as forums and chatrooms etc so it will be easy to chat to people. There will be no charges for mailing, chatting or any other normal needs. The site will have a translation ability so shouldn’t be a need for translation services. It will also be ok to exchange contact details although I advise getting to know someone first before moving off site and always follow safe guidelines and Never send money to someone you don’t know. I am available to answer any questions you may have. Regards Tom.
      ps website isn’t active yet

      1. How may I find out more about your proposed new website? I have been to the PI a number of times and am familiar with both the scammers and the really nice ladies that are available there, but spending many hours on dating sites is not working out too well. I know exactly the type of person I am looking for, but want to have a better tool for finding that person before I make another trip to the PI (it’s been some number of years since my last visit). So I am very interested in learning more of your website.

      2. really? why would you go to the huge trouble of building yet another dating website?
        I’ve used Pinay Romances that’s advertised here for a few years when i travel to PH a few times a year. yeah sure you need to weed out the ones that don’t fit the bill – thats the same everywhere.
        you talk about websites charging huge amounts – again, really?!?!? huge?!?! what utter BS
        building a website is a huge expense, not some $25 for a few months

  4. I have to tell you a story aboit me that married a 19 year old very beautiful and im 43 and very handsome good shape i moved there and lived on and off 5 years it was good there she was great but when we moved to usa it all came apart always asking for money to send tpo her family it ended badly for both

  5. Hello Frank and yes my wife and I will be planning to have a child in the near future With our big age difference I realize that she will be on her own in the future.As she has no direct family in the Philippines the least I can do is to make sure she has a family here in Canada.Thanks for your comments regarding age difference, Rudy

  6. Old and young can happen successfully.Found my dear Filipina in married in Pampanga in 4 years later living in Canada.I am 77 yrs old in good shape she just turned 26 tiny and beautiful….great family.I have no money living on old age pension she works and we have a wonderful life together.Is it possible…YES!

    1. Hi Rudy. I hope you will provide your wife with a baby in the future. Filipinas are great mothers & carers. She must be sad to have no family. If you both love each other your age difference does not matter. When you are dead. She will not have part of you to love & to care for. Yes I have a Filipina partner much younger than me. She wants children with me. A school teacher & degree educated lady. You are a lucky man, Few will have the experience of being in a happy relationship with a Filipina.

    2. @Rudy. That is incredibly silly, and can only end badly. As such things normally do. What time do you have left, 10 years or so max? You are selfishly wasting this young lady’s time.

      I am going to the Philippines to retire, but I have more sense than to do what you have done. GOD! My children are all older than this lady of yours.

      Paalam senyor 4M mangmang na tao….Marum.(isang pusa)

    3. hey rudy i am 65 this year and she is 28 – together long distance 3+ years – was married to ex bar girl ended bad but i have a divorce and will remarry in thailand – then bring her to Canada – BC/Vancouver. She is a farm girl, batangas and sweet. I know the tricks and the scams and how to ask the same question 5 diff ways – see what the answers are and so far 100%. No lies, no cheating, no disrespect. Oh and we met when i was on welfare, in a rut i didnt send her money as i didnt have enough for me – she liked me and had the opportunity to be with many others, younger and monied, i was honest with her and singe i am a Project manager I can get work (went through a bad divorce with a canadian girl and lost everything) the beautiful bar girl lied and cheated – so i divorced her (her niece helped me even, how about that?) This girl is wonderful and yes shes attractive to all men and all lesbians too. No kids, 1 ex bf 3 yrs b4 I came along and she was working as a maid/nanny for $75 CDN a month for a family friend for 6 yrs. I now pay her $100 / month to stay home and upgrade her education- ive been to her family farm 2x where everyone works, visited her 3 x in 3 yrs for a month each time in Manila – where i brought her up to stay with me. She went to the wet mkt each day and cooked for us at the condo i rented. She wont buy clothes in the mall but will in Baclaran. (chinese cheap stuff) – anyway, all i can do is hope it works out – everything is based on respect for each other and ourselves. The only rules are 100% honest no lies and no cheating – if u break any of them bye bye – no 2nd chances I am too old for BS in my life and she knows it. So I have been adamant about those 3 little important rules – I will keep them – she has to also. AND 3 yrs later so far so good – maybe get married this year and next year i’ll bring her over. What i like is she was with me in the bad times – so i am happy to give her good times financially (little bit) when shes here. She gets respect all the time. and yes no experience sexually, but open minded and adventurous…I hit the jackpot. and I know the difference between fake and real nervousness, smiles and happiness/sadness. Shes real.
      Like to talk to you Rudy. email me if you can –

  7. Hello to all your writers on this webpage. I read many stories so far of yours, many are very interesting and learning from it is great. Others only proof the writers point you just read before but have nothing else to say but to agree or disagree, which is normal and no need to add this stuff as we all know that is the way it is otherwise we would be all robots here.
    What I havened read here so far but there are many of those kind of people specially men are men who looking for a women like we all do and want and they all want not only a women for love and romance trust and honesty etc etc etc but there is this sex part man just don’t get easy as they all wish the way they would like.There men who want their women to have sex with other men in a there relationship this also could include bisexual women or lesbian or another couple. Do you get my point? Now how is this kind working out in filipin? You don’t need to meet any parents of filipin women and maybe that is the reason why they don’t want you to meet there parents because they know what there girls doing.
    You don’t want to talk about it if that baders any other filipin, on the other hand, you get the attention of them who wish to have and get the very same as men love and prefer and be and get happy together married or not.adultery? how is that handled if you love to be cheated upon in agreement with each other and partner? I have seen many women, men and couples do the same as in any other western country and getting more and more as they become more and more free and open minded there too. I have nothing absolutely nothing against people like that and I enjoyed my self so many times, was invited by couples, watched couples and was a couple several times as well and invited other’s to join us and all love and loved it 115% over any other “normal” sexual relation especially in a real permanent relationship, in marriage etc is even far better then in no relationship. People, women, and men getting way more open-minded and experimental and love it so much nobody wants to ever quit this way of lifestyle no more ever need to be way more honest and open and trustworthy than any other relationship or it will break and only real loving couples who are absolutely honest and open-minded can handle this kind of relationship and that is me too and that is why I want to ask about this kind of relationship in filipin. Anybody in filipin who has experiences how to meet and get women into this kind relationship permanently forever with all the benefits a normal couple wants to have as well like romance, love being there for each other honest, kind, sweet etc just like anybody else wants and needs? Please leave some in detailed experiences. I like to settle there too with the right women. and don’t worry I don’t let them rip me off moneywise. Their families I don’t need but perhaps her friends as chances are might be just the same way as one want and need and oh boy how wonderful that might be and would work out just the perfect way for me, for us, forever

    1. @Pete. If one marries a lady some 20 to 30 years one’s junior, never take her back to live in your own country. Once she learns the “lie of the land” she will run off with a young man nearer her own age, who is more capable of keeping up with a beautiful young lady’s needs. In her country, your greater wealth may keep her true, after all, she will want to inherit your money when her “4m” croaks, and leaves her a young lady of independent means..


    2. pete – re sexual preferences. There are all types but normally you will never know her true wants, curiosities etc. I dates a bi pinay for a few years. I started talking about how i liked being with an old gf who was bi curious, always wanted to try but never had the chance…and she told me she was curious all her life. She had little experience with sex or “romance” (Sex is sex only, romance is everything else – including oral pleasure and using hands fingers mouth – as in everything but making babies) but was curious to try anything and everything, she was also from a farm and had read about things, saw things on tv and seemed to be adventurous as long as i was with her she said – otherwise no way. So we did have our little episodes and yes she likes other girls (after we had them tested for all STD’s and HIV) never and I mean NEVER be sexual or romance with any woman until you have those tests done for YOU and her…best $20+ $20 you will spend at a clinic – same day – 5 hrs later they will email you your results. So my point is they will do anything t get some experience as long as its safe and you are with them. They are afraid but are very curious. You mentioned some men like to watch their women having sex with others – she has always been curious about uncut penis’ – so she wanted to just play with one not do anything else – well i told her no men but i wanted to see her with a LB she could give him a HJ and then she can sit on his **** she said she didnt want to i was more than enough for her – so i said fine. I was just baiting her to see what she wanted – so we got her an uncut LB in thailand. She was enamored at the extra skin but preferred mine for looks – I told her i wish i still had my extra skin – but….not possible now. Since she had no experience i said i liked massage each day – and i like naked and everything massaged – top to bottom, and everything inbetween but no “finish”. She can do that for me – so i told her to watch the massage girl touch me and do things she should NOT be jealous of cause shes not having sex with me so relax – she watched and was OK no anger or upset. I told her tomorrow the same – so she watched and was fine. relaxed – even had a shower while i had massage. The next day i said your turn – naked massage and a girl will touch u everywhere. but not inside. so she was nervous – and she did it and she liked it, allot. 1st time being touched by a woman, everywhere. so the nextday same we both had a massage and she was very excited – i asked her do u want to have sex in front of the massage girl she can take pics and video she said ok but i will be nervous – i said ok but it will go away just focus on us – so i spoke to the massage lady and she said sure – so we did it in front of another woman – and in the end she was nervous for sure looked like a deer in headlights…can’t fake that. I was gentle and very nice and communicated well to her – so she was never feeling like she didn’t know what was going t happen – she was fine and then the next day we did it again, and she was walking around naked in front of the massage lady peeing in front of her chatting away to each other in tagalog and very comfortable – so u see – it depends mostly on YOU how things will turn out. Trust is wonderful as long as you handle things for “her” and talk to her – make her comfortable – after that she was up for anything i want to do to give her adventure and experience safely. We never got to do the next on the list – have sex with another cvouple just watch each other – no swapping. She wanted to be watched by a woman and man and to watch them, I dare say I may have created a monster. Foreigners are so open – compared to the Philippines. Heck i am still trying to find a nude beach – or a resort that is clothing optional = naked mostly. So i have a new lady whom i will marry this year – she is also very much like that last one. Except more open minded. Cool.

      1. Some of you are spot on if you have some sense and are truly seeking love in it’s simplest form, a filipina is the finest most loving woman on this Earth. I’m not talking of the party girls of the cities. If that is what you want go for it for what it’s worth otherwise seek out a woman from the province. There you’ll find an unpretentious poor and rich in spirit woman who will adore you.They are a conservation people and if you find love there, you have found the most amazing love in the world just let her know everyday you appreciate here. Don’t worry about age. Who’s to judge?

  8. It’s a good article. I have dated several filipinas, ranging in age from 19 to 33. They were all absolutely stunningly beautiful women, ranging from 77 lbs to 92 lbs with perfect long black hair. Tiny sexy beauties, all.

    The educational system there is very poor, so you’re not getting a girl who is nearly as up to speed on life as someone in the USA. But they sure are sweet. There’s something crazy good about it.

    The point is well taken about underage girls. I was contacted on a dating site by a girl who claimed to be 18. We really hit it off, so I arranged to make a visit to her family. Turned out she was only 17. I still visited them, and she was lovely, but it’s imperative to keep it totally platonic and for the love of God have someone else with you. I found it very stressful because I thought I was going to be thrown in jail, even though her parents were all for it. Made a young pretty friend, nothing more.

    1. @David.Your little lady is over the “age of consent” in the Philippines. The age for marriage is 18. If you are a wealthy whitey who wants to marry their daughter, and give them lots of beautiful mestizo grandkids, they will encourage you, to bed and wed her.
      One thing to remember though. If you are very well equipped, which they like, but are usually so tiny you have to be very careful with them – for years sometimes, your performance in bed will be known by all her girlfriends, right down to the last little detail. (and I mean every detail The bigger you are, gives her “bragging rights” over all her girlfriends. So, if you are introduced to one of her friends, and her eyes stray down, and then she starts giggling, you will know why. The problem can be, that one or more of her girlfriends may keep trying to seduce you, because your lady’s description of your abilities has turned them on. In that case, let your lady know, and usually she will solve the problem. Although the method, may surprise, or even embarrass you.

      Purrr….Marum. (El Gato)

  9. Hi everyone. Filipino women are like all women around the world are a wide variety of types. I am sure that you can find a good Filipino woman if you are looking in the right places & when you have luck on your side.

    First look at your self why do you wish to date a Filipino. Are you a good man that only wants one lady. A good Filipino lady will give you their mind & body. They love deeply. Romance & your love is all they want.

    Western men have much to learn about Filipino ladies personality & traits. They are very emotional loving & caring people.

    When a Filipino woman loves you she will give herself freely & passionately. Be her man. Never cheat on her. She will want to have your babies. They are incredible mothers. They are also great wives & partners.

  10. Hello!! It’s good of you to have this for us who are truly interested In a serious relationship with a Philippino woman. Thanks. My situation is this. I’ve been talking a Philippino woman for about 6 month’s now and she? SEEMS to be genuine. We Skype alot, she has never asked me for money. Not ONCE since we’ve been talking. But other things concern me. 1. I know sometimes Philippino women act a little childish at times. Making silly faces just doing little silly things when you are asking the if they can be serious for just one moment. I don’t know if is a culture thing because I find that alot of other Asian women do this also. 2. Like I said we Skype alot but l Have never see her family other than maybe a couple of kids running around in which she says is her niece’s or nephew’s. I’ve never talk to her mom or dad on SKYPE or never have I seen them in the 6 month’s that I have been taking to he except sleeping on the floor in the background. 3. She has two phones in which I know that some Philippino women do. She tells me that the other phone is just for ?emailing only. Every so often we will be skyping and she will have the other phone glancing at it 4. Out of the blue we will be skyping and she will make up an silly excuse to get mad and then want to hang up. And what’s so strange are the things she gets mad at are the things that she comes up with to get mad at. Like the silly face thing I mention before. Like one day when were Skyping she made a certain silly face and I made one back as usual. She gets mad, says that I’m not being serious and hangs up. WT**** is going on here?? After 6 month’s of doing this to me now you want to get mad at ?me. I’ve had my suspicions from time to time that she’s talking to other guys or another guy I don’t know if that’s really the case or not but she acts kind of shady sometimes. I’m not saying she’s doing anything wrong but sometimes I really wonder if it’s the culture thing of alot of Philippino women acting childish and immature and I know that something if you’re going to dating a Filipino Female sometimes you are going to have to deal with but I’m also wondering does it have to do with something else like her talking to other guys and maybe getting mad at them and taking it out on me. I would appreciate your or any of the other blogger’s thoughts. Thanks!! Astro’s World Series Champions!! Go Stro’s!!! Lol

    1. @Don. Set of Rules – Online dating 101.

      1. Believe nothing you see or hear on the internet.

      2. Search her name. She could be several different women, using the same name, used by a scammer.

      3. Under no condition whatsoever, send money to her.

      4. Go over and meet her personally.

      5. If you don’t get to meet the family, you are being played.

      This lady sounds like a player to me. Ask yourself one question: Could you live with someone who goes on like this? NO? Then why are you persisting? Are you that desperate?. I saved one of the blokes at the Townhouses I used to manage. I warned him, and he got offended. BUT! I must have sowed the seeds of doubt in his mind, so he checked up. He was being played. His case was classic. How could any adult human imagine he is in love with a lady, whom he has only met on the internet?

      I will give an example. Even I nearly got conned. (not romantically) This lady appeared on a PNG forum, where we corresponded in Motuan, Tokpisin, and English. She purported to be a black lady in the USA – an accountant. She suggested we set up a fund for education of PNG kids. (Education, even Primary School, is neither free nor compulsory in PNG). Anyhow, a couple of very little things caused me to check her bona fides. She must have researched me well, for I used to be one of the sponsors of the PNG Day celebrations in Brissie. So she figured I had enough money to make it worth conning. Search: Hazina Samuel Doe. So if someone like me, with 30 years of professional experience in the computer industry can almost be conned,so can anyone. BTW. she is probably some scammers alter egos. A search shows her, as half a dozen horny looking black ladies.

      Meeoowwr….Marum. (Die romantische Katze)

    2. Hello Don

      I think Marum is right. The person you are in communication does not want you to be part of her life. A Filipino lady in love with you will want you to communicate with her family. They know you are in a relationship with your girlfriend. They will often chat with you & call you uncle. A lady in love shows it in many ways. I wish you luck in finding a lady that loves you. When a Filipina truly loves you will know. Do not think of marrying live with your partner first. Filipina ladies are very romantic.

  11. well philiphino women are nice
    i had good experience in AbuDhabi when I have no
    card for bus ,one philipino young lad y gave her card to me and when I tried to give her Deram local currency
    she said no.she even donnt expected her card to be returned.i thank that lady.
    so one has to understand phili are good ,one should be individual in deciding about person

  12. @Scott. Te best way to fit in with a culture is to learn the language. (post-haste) The immediately start learning the legends – literature – poetry etc. Don’t waste too much time drinking/socialising with other expats. If something occurs which you are culturally not sure of, ask one of the locals you have come to know. You will earn “brownie points” for asking, rather than just blundering on. Maybe I am somewhat of a chameleon, but I always seem to easily fit in and feel at home wherever I am. It may be like my attitude to food, I never prejudge. I just clear my mind, try it, then evaluate it on its merits. If you and your lady really love each other, then learning the different cultural expectations each other has, is hilarious, and great fun. And even better, with my lady and I, it used to end up in a mock fight on the floor, or whatever, and subsequently a wild lovemaking session. For instance: When I was young, in Aust rice was normally a desert, only ever with curry as a main course. So. My lady cooked me a beautiful meal. As she was going to take the rice away at the end, I put some rice in a bowl, then put ice-cream and honey on it. She looked at me in horror and said: “OH! YOU AUSTRALIANS DO STRANGE THINGS!” I replied, “You think that is strange?” wrestled to the floor, took most of her clothes off, spread the rice honey and ice-cream on her tummy, and slurped it off, with her squeaking squealing and giggling. So you see. Instead of either of us being a little miffed, it became a fun game, and an hilarious night of lovemaking for both of us. (Who said: It is the most fun one can have without laughing?)
    As I said, do not spend too much time hanging around with other expats, aside from asking initial advice, from then on, ask locals. EXPAT COMMUNITIES ARE CARICATURES OF THEMSELVES. If you don’t believe me, look at the Greek community in Melbourne, (which incidentally is the second largest Greek city in the world after Athens) or the Aussie expats in PNG. Above all ; Expect difference, enjoy it, allow yourself to change, and have fun.

  13. BTW. I am retiring to the Philippines shortly myself, I am 73yo. But I will not be looking for a woman. Just somewhere quiet near the water. I have the intellectual honesty to admit, there is no way that I could keep it up to a young lady with a normal young lady’s needs. (Both in, and out, of bed) I should know, because when I was 17, a Filipina lady and I, had each other as our first lovers. We wanted to marry and have lots of kids, but our respective parents prevented that. She was the most sexy beautiful lady I have ever had. The only problem was, that she was physically so tiny, compared to me, I had to be so very careful with her. But she was well worth it. What a lover !!! She made me so glad to be a man. ROLF. She reckoned I was beautiful too. Aside from being extremely fit and muscular etc., I cannot imagine where she got that notion from. 💑


    1. Hi Marum A 73 year old man. Would usually not be able to cope with a young healthy woman. I am 62 in a relationship with a 41 year old Filipina .My girlfriend looks like a much younger woman. Her body is incredible. She is a Sexy & passionate lady.
      I do not look like a old man. I am 6 feet tall. Blue eyes & masculine. Age does not matter if your handsome. It attracts any nationality. A successful confident alpha male are what women search for. I wish you luck in finding a nice lady before you die. Who loves you deeply. All a woman need is a good man. Treat her with respect.

      1. Hi John, I do not think 20 years age disparity too much. However you read what you wanted to. I repeat I am not looking for a lady. I am still married to an Aussie lad, but we are well and truly separated. As I said I want somewhere near a beach where I can do a bit of fishing and surfing, play chess via the net, and perhaps do a bit of writing. Night Clubs and bars have never interested me, even as a young bloke.

        At the moment I am starting Tagalog lessons, In my young days most spoke Espanol, but my lady’s dad was Spanish. his family had had plantations there for centuries before WWII. In a while I will travel over and have a look around. I do observe that Tagalog is very Spanish in structure, Hasta luego hombre. Vaya con dios.

        Purrr….Marum .(El jugador de ajedrez)

      2. Hi there John,
        I just read your post and was very encouraged. I am 56 and am engaged to a wonderful Filipina of 36y. I was actually looking for some one in their 40’s but she really ticked all the “value” boxes I was looking for and I figured that if we get a few happy decades together it is more than most people get even if they are close in ages. And we talk and talk and talk, the conversation is really good. And that was one of the values I was looking for.
        Also, I am a active weight lifter and kayaker, so I also look a lot younger than my peers, which helps i guess.

        But as I said the only thing that worried me was the age difference. So, thanks for sharing.

        1. Hi Cameron

          Like you I enjoy kayaking. I also enjoy many other sports like snow skiing. Enjoying good communication together is a important part of a relationship. I retired early from a career in teaching. I am lucky because my girlfriend is also a Teacher in the Philippines. I live with my partner in the home she owns in the Philippines. As to marriage that is for the future. At the moment we are both happy to be together. I think you should be aware your partner will most likely want children with you. When your partner is in love with you. You will know. I expect your Girlfriend has told you that you are Guapo. Soon you will know what Tampo & lambing is. Filipina women are also jealous & protective of you. I wish you both to have a happy relationship together. Regards John

  14. A lot of our self-centered, western women should see how self-sacrificng many Filipino ladies are. Many young Filipina ladies will willingly work as bar girls, to put their younger siblings through college. An employment where they have drunken,obnoxious westerners pawing all over them.
    So old western men delude themselves that the large age difference is acceptable in the Filippines. No mate. Everyone knows what these ladies are up to. But it is a far softer option than outright prostitution.Of course they want your relatively greater wealth. In exchange, they give you an agreeable sexy companion. Fair exchange no? Hopefully, you will be the good Matandang, Mayaman, Madaling, Mamatay., and die leaving them some money and a house. With a little luck, they can accelerate that process, by madly screwing you into a heart-attack. (seems a pretty good way to go to me)
    If, in your retirement you wish to do this….OK. Just don’t lie. Especially to yourself

    Purrrr….Marum. (Die schachspielen Katze)

  15. Yes I agree with you it grosses me out. Old men wanting young skirt. A 40 year old Filipino often looks like she is still in her twenties. Yes any woman wants a smart & handsome man as a partner. I do not think that a 23 year old would enjoy sex with 70 year old man. Many women are attracted by me but I am not the average 61 year old man. Most British women are over weight & fat. I would not date a woman of my age in England. It is best to have a partner that helps you keep young & active. Have you seen what a Filipino man looks like when they are 60. I put my profile on many dating sites around the world. How a man looks is very important then you will be contacted by many Beautiful women. I have dated women of many nationalities. The age range was 25 to 46. Ukrainian & Chinese ladies are nice. Yes & young British women. I prefer slim women who are sporty & healthy. I wish you luck in writing your comic book. I can see the idea is good a 70 year old man with stick be dragged around by a Filipino Bimbo to go shopping in a shopping mall. ha ha. What the action is like in the bedroom. Remember Chris the successful relationship between a Western man & a Filipino they remain silent often because they are very happy.

  16. Hi Chris. I am 61 year old White British male. 6 feet tall blue eyes. My girlfriend is a 41 year old Filipino woman. 5 feet 1 inch in height & she is slim & has a incredible figure. I was contacted on the Filipino cupid by my now girlfriend. On my profile I had put my e-mail address. She contacted me & asked me to go on Skype. On Skype the first time we chatted & listened to music together for many hours. Later that evening she sent me a e-mail she said she not only liked me I am sorry I have fallen in love with you at first sight. I thought it was just physical attraction on her part at the time. Now over a year later. My girlfriends feelings have grown even deeper. I was not expecting when I contacted my now girlfriend this situation would happen. We are now lovers. There are good Filipino women on dating sites who are not materialistic.Who would never ask for money. How I got this lucky I do not know. We are living together in the home she owns. All my girlfriend wants is that we live together long term in the Philippines. Not marriage. I think most western women cannot compete when you have a lover like this. She is passionate sexy & sometimes aggressive when love making.She is a school teacher. I am a retired teacher. We have great deal in common. We are both Virgos. I do not look 61. I am fit healthy & masculine. She does not see a old man. She sees her lover. If a woman is in love with you age does not matter. A man had better be faithful with a good Filipino woman. A woman like this is a one man woman.She dislikes all the Filipino men. She is a widow who was married to a Filipino man. Who had many of the bad Filipino male traits.A good woman does not want your money she wants you.

  17. Oh, and one more notation. I thought I read that if a foreigner doesn’t have a lot of money, he has no business dangling a relationship in front of a Filipina. I may have misstated what was said, but a lot of men come here with a fixed income and that is that. Maybe they don’t want to start a business, but just live comfortably. So long as they are up front with their potential girlfriends or fiancées about their financial situation, it shouldn’t dissuade them from moving here. ‘I can afford a nice 3br condo, occasional trips to Manila, and I can probably afford to have a single child I can keep and support through to college (whether I live that long or not), and this is how much money I can probably leave you when I die, to be split with my adult children overseas.’ Whatever it is. Honesty and forthright behavior is important. If your Pinay girlfriend wants three kids, yearly shopping trips to Hong Kong, then time to move on.

  18. Very interesting article. It seems to equable and balanced and practical and certainly not offensive to or degrading to women…at least in my opinion. For the record, I am happily married for nearly 35 years to a Filipina I met in the States, and we have retired here. I am used to seeing the May December relationship in full force and completely understand the tradeoff of money and security vis a vis companionship and sex/love/etc. for the older foreigner. It’s just how it is. I still remain oddly judgmental about old 60+ males hooking up with 20-30 year old Filipinas as just…ugh. A lot of folks on advice sites say that the Filipinas don’t care about age so much, and don’t discern a difference between a 40 year old foreigner and a 65 year old foreigner; I think that is a crap notion as you don’t really see young Filipinas marrying older Filipino men here. It’s just a false belief that allows old guys to think that their Filipina girlfriends would naturally hook up with septuagenarians if they could. Ha. Of COURSE a Filipina…or any woman would prefer a younger, handsome male as a husband. Don’t fool yourselves, is all I’m saying.

    Anyway, still a good article. I’m doing research for a comic book tale of a foreign white guy coming to the Philippines looking for love, romance, companionship and easy sex but given that I am happily married, I need to learn how a foreign male would do it. As a consequence, I troll these advice websites. Thanks for the information…very helpful.

    1. Hi Chris. I am 61 year old White British male. 6 feet tall blue eyes. My girlfriend is a 41 year old Filipino woman. 5 feet 1 inch in height & she is slim & has a incredible figure. I was contacted on the Filipino cupid by my now girlfriend. On my profile I had put my e-mail address. She contacted me & asked me to go on Skype. On Skype the first time we chatted & listened to music together for many hours. Later that evening she sent me a e-mail she said she not only liked me I am sorry I have fallen in love with you at first sight. I thought it was just physical attraction on her part at the time. Now over a year later. My girlfriends feelings have grown even deeper. I was not expecting when I contacted my now girlfriend this situation would happen. We are now lovers. There are good Filipino women on dating sites who are not materialistic.Who would never ask for money. How I got this lucky I do not know. We are living together in the home she owns. All my girlfriend wants is that we live together long term in the Philippines. Not marriage. I think most western women cannot compete when you have a lover like this. She is passionate sexy & sometimes aggressive when love making.She is a school teacher. I am a retired teacher. We have great deal in common. We are both Virgos. I do not look 61. I am fit healthy & masculine. She does not see a old man. She sees her lover. If a woman is in love with you age does not matter. A man had better be faithful with a good Filipino woman. A woman like this is a one man woman.She dislikes all the Filipino men. She is a widow who was married to a Filipino man. Who had many of the bad Filipino male traits.A good woman does not want your money she wants you.

      1. Good for you. Not that anyone cares, but a difference of 20 years or so doesn’t bother me. It’s the 70 year old men with the 25 year olds that just kinda grosses me out. Met one 70 year old ex coast guard American who introduced his 23-year-old, fresh-outta-the-barangay girlfriend he was trying to convince to marry him after having known her for two months. Eyeroll, please. This was his second attempt at Filipina marriage, the first having abandoned him when they returned to the States, going TNT there I believe.

        I know true love can happen, or at least affection, but these old farts with two ton bellies and in poor health, overweight who think that their young Filipina doesn’t care that they look old and crappy is a major ‘WTF are you thinking, pal? It’s your peso account that scored the deal’ from me.

        1. Yes I agree with you it grosses me out. Old men wanting young skirt. A 40 year old Filipino often looks like she is still in her twenties. Yes any woman wants a smart & handsome man as a partner. I do not think that a 23 year old would enjoy sex with 70 year old man. Many women are attracted by me but I am not the average 61 year old man. Most British women are over weight & fat. I would not date a woman of my age in England. It is best to have a partner that helps you keep young & active. Have you seen what a Filipino man looks like when they are 60. I put my profile on many dating sites around the world. How a man looks is very important then you will be contacted by many Beautiful women. I have dated women of many nationalities. The age range was 25 to 46. Ukrainian & Chinese ladies are nice. Yes & young British women. I prefer slim women who are sporty & healthy. I wish you luck in writing your comic book. I can see the idea is good a 70 year old man with stick be dragged around by a Filipino Bimbo to go shopping in a shopping mall. ha ha. What the action is like in the bedroom. Remember Chris the successful relationship between a Western man & a Filipino they remain silent often because they are very happy.

  19. nice write up, this is a very fun country to visit but you have to make sure you keep thinking with your big head and not the little one, with how cute the girls are that isn’t always easy

  20. From a young boy I went out with the best looking girls in my year at school an from the all girls school up the road. I have always had very pretty girls an often thought I’m punching above my weight. Since I have been properly single this last five years an seeing as I have always been attracted to small,slim,petite ,cute-big smile happy go lucky,polite girls… I thought I would look to find myself a Filipino wife.

    I’m a single lad of 42, I have a condo, a car, a career, savings an no kids. I’d like to think I’m the finest catch for a Filipino wife of 25

    1. I’m so sad to read your comments about Filipinas. Philippines is one of the poorest country,can you blame them? No! But please not all Filipinas are the same.

      1. poor? are you naive? Filipinos are rich because they are industrious. the gov’t is so corrupt that is why the society looks poor. see how the economy is doing there (micro-economy) and you will know. They work on their own. Gov’t is taking mcuh of their earnings.

    2. Don’t worry mate. She could never outshine your ego. .You are, no doubt, a “priceless” catch. I hope some skank you pick up, enables you to make the payments on your Pox Doctor’s Porsche.

  21. 100% True all they want is money I was with a 53 year old for nearly 2 yrs so i Know what im talking about ,the author and other comments are 100% correct As a white guy never expect the truth no matter what, they pretend to love you , pretend to be very Christian but they even Scam their own families so as a white guy you are ” fair game; and just a Money tree Sad to Say This is the first tine I’ve seen this site + first time I’ve commented

    1. thanks for the comment Michael
      while your experience is true for many, I have a few friends myself that have lived in the Philippines for the past 6 years and are exceptionally happy with the same lady.
      No matter where you go in this world there is going to be good and bad. The same here in Thailand also, good and bad.
      Best of luck though for your future

    2. why dont you buy a female counterpart of yours in your country? maybe you are much poorer that any girl in your country that you cannot afford one. shame on you. If you’re that wealthy enough, live in your own country and shut-up.

  22. The Philippines is a safe country. Women are very approachable and friendly. However, there might be instances where you’ll meet someone who isn’t the typical Filipina and would grab the chance to fool you. Be careful with this one. Thanks for sharing these tips. You can also do online dating btw which is more safe.

  23. in the phillipines money makes a man look very handsome so be carefull and don’t fall for their scam


  25. Wow….this is an amazing site but, it is so shameful how some foreigners describe Filipino women. I am a Filipina and it hurts me to read some negative comments and what I only advised to all of you guys is don’t show your money to get your girl just show your respect and sincerity everything will follows. Because true love money can’t buy.

    1. Sounds very reasonable, at least it identifies the people you can do without.
      And for each of them there is also a good soul worth knowing.

    2. Yrll Lopez, as always it depends on which pond you fish in, if you go in with a pocket full of condoms and a try before you buy mentality, then you will find what you are looking for, at least you will both be on the same page.

      I have come across many players and quickly skirt around them, it is amazing how many beautiful sweet quality Filipino woman there are looking for a good man if you look in the right places and think/ behave like a loving decent human being. As for Filipino woman over 40, there are many both beautiful on both the inside as well as the outside.

      While you are at it, check out what many of the woman in places like Australia carry on like, many would embarrass aBangkok or Manila bar girl with their values and attitude let alone their size and personal neglect. And while you are at it, go take a long look in the mirror and see what you are offering a decent Filipino woman, you shouldn’t be surprised when you get what you get.

      The Filipino woman that I have come in contact leave me in awe, their strength of character, resiliance, dedication to family and the people fortunate enough to be in their circle of love, absolutely amazing, so very rare in western society.

      My greatest concern isn’t the woman, but whether I am a strong enough and decent enough man that I don’t disappoint the lady that I marry.

      1. Hi John Why marry. Live with them first. Do not take them away from their family & home country. Like in England now live with your partner first. Then when you are both ready marry. I am living with a Filipino woman who thinks in the same way. Divorce in the Philippines is not easy. Many unhappy men & women due to marrying the wrong one. Think of the romance of living together. Be happy.Marriage will be most likely happen when you have been together for a long period of time. In fact you are married except not having a piece of paper.

    3. Right. Easy to get caught up with fear. But a little caution is wise and we should all be mature enough by now any way.

    4. Thank you …. call man. You read enough of these and it gets a little confusing.
      I’ve had some bad experiences on some sites .
      I am retired and have a reasonable income and savings. And I would like to write the last chapter of my life in the Philippines. Currently I’m communicating with someone for the past six months. I’m an optimist and maybe a little foolish as well… For sure LOL
      I hope and pray this is the real thing…

      1. Hi Tony First do not send her any money. Small gifts are fine & cards. Go to the country for a month. Date the lady & be romantic and give her red roses. If your Filipino girl friend is in love with you. You will know. Think about living permanently in the country. Your girlfriend should be educated & working. A career like a teacher. Has she worked abroad before. Be supportive in what she wants to do in her work career. It is likely that your girl friend is younger than you. If your online girlfriend is in her twenties. Then I am sure you are not likely to be equal or likely to have a successful relationship. Enjoy your time in the Philippines. Watch out for scammers. But also look out for a good woman.I wish you success.

      2. @Tony. If you are in your 60s, why worry about romance? Just find yourself somewhere quiet, preferably far from the larger cities. Learn the language and befriend the locals. Immerse yourself in the local culture and activities. If you need a sexual experience from time to time, hire an escort for a night…. Or whatever. Treat her like a lover – not a chattel – she will respond in kind. Woo her, like you’d woo a lover….Make believe is fun, for both of you.

        Honestly, if you immerse yourself in the local community, love may unexpectedly come your way. Life has a habit of doing things like that. While you are making other plans, it sneaks up on you and “king-hits” you. BTW. Try to live local style….If you can adapt that is. A bamboo house is fun. Especially if you are into entomology. If you are going to a foreign country – with not prior knowledge or language – with the intent of finding a women, your plan is already flawed, and probably doomed to failure.

        Remember the old saying: “They whom the Gods would defeat, they first make mad.”

  26. I think it would be easier to get a girl in any other country rather than in the Phillipines. Oh, so your not looking for a wife? That means that you are not looking for a girl! Eh?! Excuse me?! As you article points out, you have to ask yourself if you want to live in the States, the Philipnes, or just be a Vagabond, because if you are white, and you speak English, you need to tell people ” when you are gong back to America” Irrespective of whether you have never been to the place in your life. Have been here now for quite a few months, but I am not looking for a wife, I take exception to religious extremists who try telling me how to think and how to live my life and if I wanted to give out free drinks to a girl it would be in Thailand, where it is understood what happens next, rather than ” no way, never, I can only ever be your friend. Don’t touch me, buy me a drink”. Lovely country, lovely people, eaitiful scenery, but honestly, getting girls? You. It’s be having a laugh. By the way, girls in Thailand of 18 are quite mature and equate quite well to older men.

  27. I would like peoples thoughts and experiences please. I was working in Manila meet a girl feel in love you know the story.
    She’s married been separated for a year.
    So adultery is the problem. I read lots about. I know …..
    So your thoughts please

  28. Filipina are like all women. You must be careful. Many Filipina told me strait away that 95 percent are for the money. They claimed that they are that 5 good percent. They lie. They even lie to themselves. Every single one asked after a while for support. I gave them all Western Union money transfer number. The same fake number. So I had chance to revise their pure love when they went mad. Fortunately I am not rich western desperate man and I don’t trough away money. I am ordinary man who can afford everything including vacation in Middle Asia four times a year. Just honest hardworking professional in London coming from ‘Eastern Europe. I came from country similar to Philippines. beautiful, but poor. Actually not that poor because poverty rate for Poland is 5.7 when United Kingdom is 5.5. USA 13.2. Philippines 24. Why Filipina looking for Western guys and why they pull out money from them? Because they lazy to work for 500PHP a day. Its easier to find naïve foreigner and pick up money from WU. Also because they can because they are beautiful. By the way they not for long. They natural and looking gorgeous when they young. Hard to find good looking Filipina over 30. Over 40 they look not attractive at all. Look at Thai girls they look like middle twenty Filipina over 40. My observation. Consider that. If you don’t believe look at your girlfriend mother when you go see family. You Filipino beaty will look the same. Summary of everything above is that most of theme are scammers and gold diggers. To be honest its nothing wrong with it. They don’t have a choice. Its survival. For most of them foreigner its the best and only option. If you have been in Philippines in province, not rich hotels and resorts. You will know what I am talking about. When I met my wife I spent two weeks in her family house. Living in very poor conditions. There was not even nice hotel around, not even ATM. Just small barangay in Mindanao, but very nice people. I met my wife when she was in HK working as domestic helper. She bought ticket to Philippines. I bought mine. She actually spend her monthly wage in advance. We met we matched. We spend very nice time together. Before we met I made agreement with her. Financial agreement. Who pays for what etc. It worked. When I got engaged I also made agreement with her parents. Everything was strait forward. I don’t want to tell you details, but as you know I am not rich foreigner so I had to play poker game, but I was honest. I said I want to live in Philippines. I wanted to check if she is with me only for visa.My wife hit the ball back. She said we get married when she finish contract in HK. She wanted to be sure she can support family and it was suggestion that she is for visa :) Few months after we got married in HK. Before we got married we made agreement. I said you come here, but you have to work. We share cost of living together. We spend money for our things together. I don’t mind about your wallet. you don’t care about mine. It works like a charm. She works she send money to family. I work I save my money. We bought two houses in Philippines as investment. She pay for one I pay for another. We rent out so we don’t really pay. My wife takes me for dinner. I take hor for dinner. We buy presents for us. We go out together. We like sport so we do actively spend time. I am good husband. She is good wife. Good Filipina. For how long? I don’t know. No one knows. What I know never trust woman, but be fair to her. love her and she will pay you back. Give your Filipina financial freedom. Don’t give her everything on plate. Treat her like partner in life not maid and slave. More likely you will be happy.

    1. Right, It maybe worth, but thats risky shot, I decided to not mess, I am from most beautiful women country in world, but you know they are “plastic” and what it means fake view of life fake manners everything copied from stars from those idiotic spoilers and thus they got spoiled themselves too grown with them, their parents grew them like sluts so they don’t even think about family here just about sex and fake lies like “you the only i like” the moment they leave your appartment – Tinder on a run at other guy after hour :D so i decided to look for onlne dating found such Philippines nice woman she claims trustworthy and lalala where it’s a chance of 95% that it’s waste of time plus might fake DNA check results even if you set a kid and you might have to support not even your kid :D how you gonna know that? :D only after 10 years when kid will grow and show no signs of fatherly similarities to you… that’s waste of time, I will never ever look at lower level women online, nothing you can count on with trust and honesty, there is no real Jesus here with them – all is just manipulation and cover under that.

      Kind Regards,

  29. Avoid Filipina in serious life. Cambodian and Vietnamese girls are much better, even they don’t speak English. When Filipina reach 40 years old, simply look ugly. See Thai 40 years old woman. They look much better. Look at your Filipina mother when you go there. This is your future wife if you desperate to get married. Filipino girls are only good for fun when they young. Go there only for fun. You have more fun in Philippines. Play role man looking for wife. Date online many girls. Meet them fuck them and fly away. Never trust Filipina and Filipino people. Stay away from any connections. Philippines are beautiful. Unfortunately people there are fake. All about money and using foreigners. They lazy, useless. Even if you give them job, they will not work. Simply. All truth about Philippines. I had deferent point of view before. Unfortunately I was in Philippines many times. I had many girlfriends, I was going to marry one. I really wanted to. Everything comes to one point. Have a more fun in Philippines.

    1. I am Filipina. I do agree with you when it comes to laziness. Using men for money agree that 80% are for money. TheI view in life is to stay home and spend money. Most of them are uneducated women who do those type of things. Most educated Filipinas are entrepreneurs. I have friend. She is very beautiful even at the age of 35 she looks as if she is 15 years old. She dated men thinking that her beauty nails and looks will last. I am educated,and I tried very hard to help her out to become like me (business minded). She always refused to help me start a business. She likes luxury cars. I have those high end exotic cars. I want to get her one,but how she can pay it? I wish she can use her beauty for business I good way. She thinks that her beauty will last. I advised her several times. Unfortunately, she doesn’t care. I will be sorry for her in the future. What can I say. I am willing to pay for her schooling so she can improve. I find most Filipino people to be employees only. It’s rare for most of us Filipino to become a business minded. They like to show up nice purse,gold,and etc. They don’t even have means. Again this is based on my observations and experience with my own people. They’re not ambitious people most of us.They’ll rather work for $2000-6000 pay check a month here in America.

      1. Kamusta ka, beautiful lady. To be satisfied with one’s lot is not necessarily laziness, but it can be. This is what we whiteys like about Filipina ladies, they are usually so uncomplicated. Honesty, many of them are LBFMs. I do not mean that in the snide derogatory way most westerners do, but as a mark of honour. I have never known other ladies who are so “always up for it”, and so good at it. What great lovers. We men are really simple creatures, Feed us well, and f–k us well and we will never leave. The few that do are not worth considering. Unfortunately, this appears to be beneath the dignity of western women. My lady wanted nothing more, than my total and unconditional love. Those of her friends who had Aussie BFs were precisely the same. Men really do not want women who come with a lot of baggage, and strange psyches. ie; The Aussie lady I married, really did not enjoy being a female, and was a control-freak. You may not believe this: But she would only ever have sex in one position only, would only do it once a night, and never in over 40 years gave me oral sex, even though I always did it for her. What a difference to my filipina lady. She used to quite embarrass me with what she said and her eagerness to “eat me all up” as she put it. She was a lover beyond my wildest dreams, and in return I did the very best I could for her. She was never reluctant to tell me what she wanted, or what she enjoyed most. All we ever wanted to do, was marry for ever, and have lots of children. Unfortunately that was not to be. Parents of course, as I have said in my other postings. How much different both our lives would have been, had that happened. One can only dream. Her commitment to marriage was unbelievable too. She told me one night, that when we were married, even if I beat her, she would still always be my wife. I kissed her all over, and assured her I would never do that. Hell! I could not even bring myself to spank her, even when she asked for it. I was too conscious of her little soft brown bum, and my big hard hands from competition weight-lifting. I would rather kiss it, than hit it. I never did hit to my Aussie lady either. So I hope you are pleased to learn, that not all of us whiteys are users and abusers either.

        Magandang gabi makatarungang babae….Marum Katze.

        1. BTW. I hope my poor attempts at Tagalog, are no too lousy.. I am just starting to learn the language. I my day nearly everyone spoke Espanol. My ladies dad was Spanish. In those days, it was not done, for a well bred Asian lady from a good Asian family, to go out with western men.

  30. HELP!


    1. @Joe: The “Caps Lock” key s the little one on the left, three up from the bottom. On your computer that is. If it is on your lady, it is her belly-button. When you meet her, try to speak softly. Unless, of course, she is deaf.

      As a guess, from your posting, I don’t think you are the type of person who could meld into another culture. Now I am aware the “faint heart ne’er won fair lady”, but a fusilladenous attack at mega-volume, probably wouldn’t either.

      Your posting made this cat laugh….Marum. (El Gato)

  31. Just to clear up some bad information regarding statutory rape laws in the Philippines…
    The age of consent in just 12. However, the minimum for marriage is 18 through 20 only with parental consent. No marriage under 18.

  32. I came onto this site because I was curious about this type of arrangement, because my little brother decided to take a weekend holiday to Manila from Japan. He has always been into Asian women I think, which I have no problem with. I just wanted to say that while you seemed to give sound advice, I will be seeking another article to send my brother for advice because of the degrading mindset of the author, towards the end of the article.

    Ask yourself this: If you were poor and we’re struggling for day to day necessities such as food or supplies, and had no way of getting those, wouldn’t you be tempted to try to find a better situation, at any costs to support you and your family? I’m not filipina, but I can attest that there families are close knit and have a strong sense of community, unlike a white, American family. So when you’re going overseas to “save” this young woman from her living conditions, and expect her to willingly marry you under the sole pretense of you having more money, why would you be surprised if she turned out to be materialistic? After all, you sought out that kind of girl.

    Anyway, most young women dream of finding a man, in her age group, which she is attracted to, and she falls in love with, to sweep her off her feet. Don’t fool yourself in thinking, for one minute, that if you’re an unattractive, old guy, that a 20 year old girl is going to truly fall in love with you. Rarely, this happens, but when all of you are complaining about your overweight, old, ugly, independent exes back in your home country, take a look in the mirror.

    That said, I truly hope my handsome, fit, successful 33 year old brother, finds the woman of his dreams and saves her from becoming some old codge’s housewife-sex slave-toy-babymaker. BTW, if you aren’t successful in finding a Filipina woman and you’re an old, entitled jerk, it’s probably because you have the competition of young, successful men who have caught on to your game. I do know at least 4 guys in my age group(under 35) that have married women from the Philippines.

    1. There is a very specific American word that describes your attitude- an attitude that has become all too prevalent among American women. It’s not entirely your fault, however; you’ve been sold the Marxist lie that is feminism. Oh yeah, the word is “cunt”. If these “cunts” would remove the stick from their ass, perhaps they would find a real man (as opposed to the modern feminized metrosexual fagboy) to fuck them and they would become the women they were intended to be.

      1. You are both correct, in your own way (and from your own point of view), but Matthew…I’m still laughing…I’m not sure how “Marxist” feminism is, but you got most of the rest of it right. The problem is, so did Rachel. There are so many factors to consider in this case that many folks can be correct, as I think you both are. Oh, and Matthew…the “C” word, really? Rachel is just giving her opinion, she’s entitled.

        1. Thank you Gunnar. Matthew using the C word only weakens his case and kind of validates her case. But yes I too see both sides, but mostly hers.

    2. @Rachel: Nailed it :) excellent observation! I wonder if guys ever heard of mass migration to escape poverty, hardships from war? I bet Philippines would too if for example they’re close to Europe. But since they can’t easily travel to other countries to find someone, why not use technology?? If jobs weren’t not soo scarce over there, pinay’s won’t put up with mean foreigners that are much older than they are. I’m not saying there are no bad people in Philippines because there are mean, crazy ones. So avoid those duh!. But there are also many awesome people there as well.

      1. @ Rachael and Infrared,
        Philippine Culture is different than western, especially American culture.
        Putting your values on a a Filipinia is, frankly, ignorant.

        American urban women of my generation ( the end of the baby boomers) seem to think they must compete with men. IMO they don’t need to compete. It’s not a contest but I digress.
        Many American women want equality in everything except what they don’t want equality in. LOL

        Here’s an example from my life with an ex GF that spent a weekend with me visiting my parents. art of the “Greatest Generation”

        On the way home she said ” I don’t like how your father treated your mother”
        I was stunned. My Dad was very god to my Mom. they had a true partnership.
        I asked fpr specifics.
        She said, ” At lunch your Dad asked your Mom to get him a beer and she got up from the table and got it for him.” That was terrible!”

        I said,” Yeah. he did.
        Did you notice at around 5PM my Mom said, ” Homey. I’d like a Tom Collins.”
        ” My Dad then went to the bar (which was in the basement) and made her a Tom Collins and brought it upstairs.
        Which was the greater effort? Walking 5 feet to the fridge for a beer or going downstairs and mixing a cocktail?”

    3. I completely agree with the things you said on your post. :)
      I am Pinay,but smart one. I am 42 but I look in my 20’s. I went to school in USA. So I am more educated than those who didn’t. I took Philosophy, Logic,and Psychology,and etc.

    4. Very well said. I’m 26 and have a 31-year-old American boyfriend who I met online and never counted falling in love with. He is wonderful and we are equal partners. I’ve always been fiercely independent and have never asked him for money. We will be celebrating our first anniversary in a week and are getting married.

      I have friends who are in happy respectable relationships with Western men as well. I wish your brother luck.

      I’m sorry these men had the terrible experience they had, but you can’t come to another country expecting to go things your way when you yourself have some self-serving agenda of your own.

  33. I am currently using Facebook Messenger for video call so I can see how the girl looks like everything around her looks like so surprises here, I haven’t sent any money nor there was any ask for it either, so far it’s been like a month-and-a-half since I’ve met this one girl. the best thing to do for me is to send an invitation letter so she can come to visit me hopefully to stay if not well she can go back

    1. Why wouldn’t you go and visit her in the Philippines and get to know her in her own surrounding? Sounds like a fun and interesting holiday if nothing else

  34. Filipina here. 1 tip i can share to avoid feeding the whole family :) or becoming a God trying to make miracles to solve financial problem of Pinay family, find someone who is professional and earning at least 400$ a month :) and let her work. So that you will only take of your partner and HER to her own family. I think, partners just need to talk, being honest, and knowing priorities. If you dont agree with each other, then look for another lady.

  35. hi I am also going down the track of a Filipino wife, and yes I had heard all the stories about scammers and all the rest I told my girl the truth about what I thought and how the financial situation would be and is, I have not sent any money told her I never would, and that the cost of every thing would be split both ways, which she has agreed to, I am ,of there in 8 weeks for our first visit, it seems protocol is nothing at all, I have to fly in asia which I absolutely hate doing, would nearly rather chew my arm of…and stay at hotel while we get to know each other personally all this is my cost . and if she decides no, I m out of pocket about 3k just on her whim,{{{{{{{{{{bad side of brain there}}}}}}}}}}}} so if all goes well I get to see my new partner in her environment, which in my book still puts me in an position of trying to find my way in the dark, ie have stepped on toes, will I wind up in a river for a few hundred bucks, i thnk not, I have found a solution to this her sister is already here in oz, and her brother inlaw travels frequently to laoag so we can go together and I am sure, this will result in a great exchange of views and a clear outcome, I sure don’t want to become a statistic, or a story at the pub ,cheers

  36. Kevin this is an excellent article ..I couldn’t disagree with anything you said. I was fortunate enough to have a childhood friend of mine marry a fillipino. .and they introduced me to a cousin… your reply to the self righteous Ann was spot on. These people deal with death all the time. It’s crazy what they have to deal with. My girl is a province girl but I prefer it that way. My thinking is her values are more in place than a girl raised in Manila. .but that is just my opinion. She is motivated to graduate college not just be a day to day like someone stated. She is going to finish college in the states with me. It is her dream to finish. I am 25 years older. I only had one person tell me how bad I was..I told her that’s because she lives in the states and not the Philippines. .anyway .if just got back and the petition is submitted. .here is hoping for a speedy approval.

  37. Hi.A very interesting site.Just one thing to add.If the girl becomes pregnant then get a DNA.I married this girl who was 6 weeks pregnant .Yes you can guess.A pinoy!!!!! do i care? Yes and no.I love this boy who is now 5 years old.Hes my best friend.Thank you all for your input.Most of it i agree with.GOOD LUCK TO ALL.

    1. Hey to all!

      I just want write down my experience. I was falling in love into a pinay. Hmm, still i blame my self that i didnt brake up a year before…..i was so damn stupid to just look for the beauty outside…
      She was following me to Germany, Netherlands, Japan, China…..
      After 2 years, i decided to give this relationship up, cos i had enough, enough to be scared when she call me, that she will argue with me…. that she argue, even in .public…

      Yes true, she give up a lot….follow me everywhere…

      But true is also, she argue about simple stuff…that she made very good.
      I be not the kind of person who argue…i rather try to work things out in a normal way…maybe thats wrong if u have a pinay….it look like they need someone who argue back with yelling

      After all, we broke up for 3 times in 2 years……(now i think, dont go back to an EX, it will just taste like a worm up food)
      Yes i had loved her, but my mind told me, this will not going any better after Merriage….

      So, i decided to be single….. BUT. i still think Philippine as well as Asian girls be in average better as Western gils……
      so, in 2weeks i am going back to philippines…and i will not look for a girl….it will come in time…its not necessary to look for it….(Gilrs on Dating sides are most just looking for money.
      But, i am sure i will have more fun without my Ex in my back…..last time i was in philippine with her, visited her family…even there she get cracy and argue in front of her dad with me(reason, she didnt want to dance)…..her dad told her, she is more worst then her dog……..i tried my best with her 8 month more…..until i had no energy anymore…

      After all….i dont blame her, and wish her all the best in her life….. but i assume, she have a psychiatric problem, maybe i was just not intelligent enough to help her. I would say, i was to stupid from the start and hope i have learn my lesson of life….. ;)

      i would say, the biggest chance to find a good wife in the philippine is in the province, one, who didnt have experience with foreigner.

      Hey to all…, Much luck…. and it is more fun in the Philippine……. i am looking forward to make a motorbike dirty and snorkling in the aquarium

      Note: please make all guys who love the philippines, do respect the girls and dont act there like an damn horney white ASS…..

  38. What makes a man who has worked hard all his life, raised a family and secured a future for himself dirty? At 50 years old I’m within 4 years of retirement and plan on divorcing soon. I am 13 years older than my wife but we have simply grown apart and decided to go our own ways after raising 2 children. I’m not looking for a kid but I do find younger women more appealing and more full of life. I always did the right thing by my wife. I hope to find another wife who I may be able to enjoy my retirement years with. If all this make me a dirty old man then so be it.

  39. I so glad I cane across this article, I am 29 and I found a cute Filipina who is very interested in me. We haven’t met in person yet, but I will be going in June to meet here. I have video chatted with her family even her 90 year old grandma. However, she is 18 and when the money came up, she asked me to place it in her mothers name. I did but they could not pick it up, I got it back and she has not asked ever again. After we had a spat, the mother even apologized to me, they haven’t me for money since.

    I understand I am to put here through college. But her mother has stressed she would perpher if I lived in their country however, the daughters stated she wants to leave home and return for visits.

    We have not talked about kids, or even sex for that matter, which is also due to my own feelings toward the situation. That being, her age. She seems like she wants to marry, even going so far as posting thing on facebook befriending my mother on FB. Her mother asks about my parents all the time. But I’m still worried I might be being scamed.

    Your advice is much needed.

    1. Gennaire,
      I am in a similar situation, I am becoming involved with a Filipina, and I want to know if I am being scammed. I do not think I am, but it is hard to tell. But the fact that you have met her family would seem to indicate that you are in a good situation here. Has anything else unfolded since you made this post? I would be curious to know, as it would help me.


    2. This is my humble opinion, but you should meet her in the Philippines, but before that, travel around a bit in the country before you meet her. Also ask yourself why you are meeting a girl so far from where you live? You are young so you have something going for you and against you.

      For you is your age, then you should check out the other girls around the country. Against you is your age, meaning you had better be financially stable. If you haven’t met the girl “naturally” then don’t expect them to be patient with you if you have financially difficulties.

    3. They have all the time in the world careful, diligent and do many google image searches. If her fb has you cut out in some ways, look thru her friends and her friends’ may find aliases this way. I was duped for 7 months after literally going thru dozens of scammers! The big sell with her was the posts on fb an talking all the time to her and her family on skype. Pay attention to surroundings..are all her siblings always on a mobile device but she is the only cutie. There are some many subtle tell tale signs..just take your time and remove your heart from the equation. These scammers are taught to get the lonely guy to fall in love and I did, it hurt bad!!! I wouldn’t wish it on anyone!! All the good scammers never ask for money and when or if you offer, they will say no or even act prideful about it…they know ,most men send money anyway!!

      1. @Marc: very sorry to hear about your bad experience. That was terrible and very mean. You’re advice is good. My personal advice to guys is please don’t rush. Go there as friends and make lots of friends first. Get to know them. Choose good friends not questionable ones, avoid those. Your new friends will help you find good ones. Get to know them first before falling or committing yourself. It’s basically common sense and Have fun!

  40. Kevin, and or anyone else living there with the desire to make a little money and serve a good purpose. I am also looking, joined the dating web sites, I have to say at this point ” WHAT A MESS” seems appropriate, you cant trust any of them, and many articles I have read have excellent points. Kevin, why don’t I come over, bring a little money and we open a PROFESSIONAL business finding decent women for men. Use a good screening process, be a head hunter if you will and serve both the man and woman. Seems to me a professional service benefits everyone, at this point that is what I’m looking for. I thought, ok the thing to do here is ask someone their to find a friend for me, a member of he family next door what better way than have someone there recommend a decent person…. I think I have a new business idea…
    Sorry it’s 3 AM and I’m crossed eyed from chatting on the dating sites, I might start drinking if this keeps up….

  41. Filipina here. I’m afraid all of the scams you say are true and a sad proof that we’ve gone down the drain…:(

    I’ve been really fascinated at why Western men are coming over to Asian countries to find wives or a girlfriend. Been reading some articles about how Western women can tend to emasculate men and that some women can tend to be overbearing and dominant….yet on some articles some women wonder why they haven’t found the right man for them!

    As a woman, I find that sad. All women deserve a partner in life that they can depend on and that they are free to be who they are–not as someone to fit a narrow ideal. Women need to feel that they are fine the way they are and don’t need to overcompensate by being too dominant or too ambitious. Women should stop demanding of their men if they can’t match the demands

    I have nothing against foreign older men marrying younger women from my country. As long as the relationship is truly loving and mutual and both are happy, I’m all with that…besides it’s an improvement of my race…:) But I prefer to marry someone younger and stronger as I don’t want to start over again and love another man.

    I just have to make a comment after seeing “Anna” behaving so arrogantly. I’m sorry about that. Some Pinays just have too much pride in them.

  42. I came across this article while being curious over Filipinas milking money from Westerners LOL. I have no Filipino blood but is rather Chinese, but I was born, raised and is living in the Philippines currently. But I am shamefully admitting that I’m guilty of the automatic gold-digging mindset whenever I see foreign men, especially Westerners with Filipinas. I can vouch that their are actually a lot of them, but of course, we do have that in other countries as well so it’s just a matter of luck.

    I want to correct the $100 average wage though, the $100 average is for those who have low to no education who ends up as salesladies to stores in non-famous malls or delivery personnel for small retail stores. Otherwise, the normal (more of minimum) average wage is around $230/month for your inexperienced young person in a full time job such as an office clerk.

    But for those who have gone through college, even from not-so-reputable universities can get their first salary despite being inexperienced to around $300-500 a month. Personal experience.

    BTW, bless you for providing a one-stop guide for foreigner men.

    I do hope some foreigners would stop degrading the image of the Philippines due to one sad experience with one.

    1. I do hope some foreigners would stop degrading the image of the Philippines due to one sad experience with one.

      This sentence saids it all , the blame is always on the foreigner.
      Logic would command writing
      ‘I do hope Pinays would stop degrading the image of the Philippines due to misbehaving with foreigners’

      You put the blame on the victim in your sentence

  43. I never visited Philippines but I think that most tips of this post are useful to find and meet girls of other countries.

  44. Kevin, I have spoken with the girl who is pictured at the beginning of your post or someone representing themselves as her on Date in Asia. Can you tell me who this girl is or how you came to possess the picture.

    1. Original author here … like Martin said stock image. Anyone using stock photos as themselves is a bad deal. Every girl in philippines has access to web cams so easy to not be scammed when it comes to knowing what a girl really looks like.

      1. Kevin, I’m 56 and have been to the the Philippines 3 times over 10 years. Thinking of moving there when I retire, whenever that may be, but with some trepidation. I have no kids. Curious, how old are you and are your kids still very young? You look pretty young in the photo with your wife.

  45. I have been to Thailand and Philippines many times…
    Spent months in every time…
    I am 35, never married before and whether you believe it or not really good looking…
    Marrying a Thai or Filipina, in my opinion doomed to be horror story 99 percent of the time…
    Just ask yourself, are you really that lucky to be in the remaining 1 percent…
    Yes, they are beautiful…
    Yes, they are very different than western women…
    Maybe they will be honest to you but eventually you begin to hear stories about how poor they are, how hard the life is in their countries…
    Yes, these are all true facts…
    They are poor and we are lucky just to born in Western countries…
    But if you are traveling with a lady, staying at the top resorts, eating drinking whatever you like and at least in my situation you are appropriate in age, do you really want to listen about their huge huge huge families and none of them are capable of taking care of themselves…
    Please dont get me wrong, I am not saying they want money from you…
    In fact they will never ask for anything if you explain yourself clearly at the beginning…
    I never gave anything to any one of them, just told them that I want to spend time together and see what will happen…
    Maybe but only maybe some of them really liked me…
    It is very hard for us to know exactly when they are lying, when they are telling the truth…
    Everybody lies including us, so they are too…
    It doesnt mean they are bad people just because they lie sometimes…
    But I always find it harder than usual to believe their tears are true,their sadness for your leaving is true…
    These are all my opinions, there are good human beings and bad human beings all over the world…

    P.S. English is not my native language, please forgive if anything’s wrong in my writing…

  46. Love the Article. I just returned from the Philippines, 1/2015, and have decided to start my research and travels to find a wife. From what I saw it should be no problem. I am sick of American women. Even my foreign girlfriend that has lived here too long is too materialistic. Cant wait to return to the Philippines.

  47. I have some experience in this having married in the Phils and living abroad with my wife. Some observations: It’s hard to generalize about where they are from. I went there to meet several girls but found it easier to relate to the “city” girl than the province one. I was told that the province girls are a better bet, i had bought into that notion that they are prettier, more docile, etc. but after meeting them, I didn’t think they were going to fare so well living out of their country .Yes, the province girls did appear to be easier going, but … don’t you want a girl who can relate to you anyway? The “city” girl also quite possibly has better person skills, a good thing to have. and most of the “bar” girls are actually from the provinces who are trying to make it in the city. All I am saying is don’t believe any of the generalizations – just judge the girl and yes, don’t jump to a rush/rash decision. In the end you’ll make a good choice..

    1. Original author here. I agree with you, actually. Of course, its hard to broadly paint every girl and there are probably many exceptions to the rule. However, there’s some blunt truths that you need to face regardless. Province = poor. Poor = uncultured, uneducated, less motivated to achieve anything other than living day by day. Sometimes, a whole lot of pretty and a whole lack of anything in common.

      Girl who grows up in the city probably has a very nice bathroom and knows how to keep it clean. Its expensive living in the city, so she works hard at a conventional job. Perhaps shes gone to college. She will usually be a more well rounded girl all the way around. That will become important when the honeymoon is over you’ll have more in common with a city girl.

  48. Reading this article and the comments just makes me wanna barf! I cannot deny the fact that most of your ‘observations’ are true BUT they’re only true to Filipina women who mostly are poor, living in the province, did not go to college and are bread winners of their family and works as a saleslady, waitress or a bar girl. I bet you that a young urban professional Filipina woman, let say an accountant, nurse or a teacher will not even give a white man in his 50s a second look. She will probably barf coz an old dirty man is trying to hit on her.

    1. I’ll take that bet, Anna and further say you know nothing of Asian culture.
      I’m a 56 year old man who now lives in Thailand and a few of my friends of similar age live in the Philippines. We’re also all so-called professional men and not your derogatory classification of ‘old dirty men’.
      I’ve only ever dated women who are 30+ years old. You might not understand that many Asian cultures actually see older men in a mature and respectful point of view. Something that Western people might be better served to learn from.
      Thanks for your visit and comment.

    2. Original author of the article here. You have some misconceptions. There are no “bar ladies” in the province, as there are no foreigners in the province, or those who would pay for their services … bar ladies live in urban centers. They typically don’t get married because it would prevent them from being bar ladies. In general, those who have money, typically want more money.

      I realize you can’t get it into your head that a younger girl would want to marry a man 15 to 30 years older. Your opinion is probably extremely common, in fact, I’d bet 99% of people in the US would consider it a horrible, dirty, disgusting thing — and look down on the girl for doing it. Fortunately, I decided to spare my wife the glares and stigma, by staying in the Philippines, where the situation is quite normal. There are huge age differences in native marriages here, it is a common thing.

      Maybe that $348 per month is enough so they can marry a Filipino who is younger? Good for that nurse then. There is no child support in the Philippines, and men often leave after a time, without paying child support. I can’t even tell you how often this happens — how many children are born and the guy leaves, here in the Philippines — I’d venture to say its 50% of the time. Being drunk, gambling, fine with leaving kids behind when going gets tough, I hate to portray the entire set of Filipino men out that way … but it is generally assumed that if they find a foreigner, a girl will have a stable, secure life, kids are taken care of and without financial hardships. It is generally assumed that if they go with a filipino guy, it is likely to be the opposite. I’m not being self-important or putting down filipino guys, that’s just the way it is, so girls have to pick their poison.

      Picking their poison, if you’re a Filipina girl, pick a dirty old foreigner who will pay for college, pay for kids to go to college, pay hospital bills if kids get sick, provide security … or pick a Filipino man who is far more likely to leave when the going gets tough (and with average wages being $348 for a “professional”, the going gets tough quite often). Fortunately, there are women who aren’t quite so shallow and actually love their dirty old foreigners.

      Not to mention, half-western kids are incredibly charismatic. Half the TV shows in the Philippines have actors who are half westerners. Two of my 3 kids are blonde, they’ll have incredible opportunities in life here (all 3 are incredibly handsome). I’m sure that is a strong factor — even if its on a deep, subconscious level girls want to marry a guy with home their kids will considered exceptional. Again, I’m not being self-important — that’s just the way it is.

      The gist I took from your post is that old men are dirty and girls with integrity wouldn’t marry for security. That is your opinion, to you its valid. Life is different in different areas of the world though. There is absolutely zero social net in the Philippines. A little girl died across the street from me with dengue fever. Her parents were too ashamed to ask money from me to help, until it was too late. She died at the hospital shortly after she got there. It was a heartbreaking experience. I paid another family for their boy to have his appendix removed. After the operation, they didn’t pay for medicines, considering it too costly. The boy died. Perhaps if you grew up around constant death for lack of a few hundred dollars, you’d consider finding a man who could actually provide for their family. I do take offense at being called “dirty” — my kids have also gotten dengue fever, and other issues have happened, though they were resolved immediately because this “dirty old man” loves his kids and takes care of them.

    3. Anna my girl. You sound like the average western woman. You are as racist as hell about Asian women. When I was young it was, “You just want a slave.” about any man who married an Asian lady. Most western women consider it beneath their dignity to really be nice to their man. Once they have – their house – their car – their family, their man can go and stuff himself, for all they care However if he finds someone more agreeable to be with as a mistress, they are the worst buggers in the world. Example: I was making love to my Aussie wife, (I have posted about her in other postings) I was trying to do my very best for her. (I was renovating the bedroom) Halfway through she said:”You know the ceiling would look better blue. Obviously what I was doing was totally inadequate. After that I gave up on her, and spent much more time at work. At least I got thanks for that, and a bonus at Christmas.

      BTW. I was being patronising on purpose. Because you sound like a spoilt child.

      Grrrooowwwwwlll….Marum.(Die Schrullenhaftkatze)

  49. you can find a good girl from Phillipine but you should look very careful, there are some good and not good. So good luck with your girl.

  50. I am planning to marry a Filipina now living in Singapore and working as a Domestic helper/Nanny. she is almost 32, never married, I am 69.. I realize what I am bringing to the table as far as stability etc.. I am not rich but retired Military. still actively working as a photographer..

    the thing I have noticed about he. She did introduce me to her family, She has never asked for money. I did help her buy a new computer but she fussed and fussed with me until I agreed to let her pay half. I did send some money to her family after the big typhoon. but she limited the amount to only what she could match herself. Once he sister hit me up for money for a school filed trip. I ask her if I should give to her sister. She said absolutely not and said she would scold her sister for coming to me. So I think I have a good one :-)

    1. Hi Ron. Thanks for comment and your wonderful story.
      There’s always things to watch with any culture including Filipinas or Thai ladies (where I am now). If you keep a level head, know potentials pitfalls and take things slow and steady, you are bound to eventually stumble across the lady that seems a good fit for you.

      And that sounds exactly what you’ve found. From what you said, you have found a good lady who is interested in your well-being and, more importantly, interested in you. Age is not an issue in the Phillipines or Thailand which is fantastic.

      Well done and congrats, Ron

    2. Hi i have the same expirience with you after i read thru everything like bad to good or good to bad.. I meet this phillipines girl in this viet social.. so far shes good to me and im good to her.. I cant see her because im in Malaysia and shes there but we do sykpe everydy just to keep our relationship longer and of course forever.. she told me that she is a strong woman working with 2jobs sometimes and i ask her if u not enough money u can ask from me but then she said dont want and she can handle her self.. So i think from this point is that some is golddigger and some is not.. Just that u really have to look for someone who really works hard for their family or who have gone thru a bad times before..

  51. “Many Filipino families would be thrilled to pawn off their 15 year old daughter to speed up her becoming the goose that lays golden eggs” That sounds horrible :( I would hate to see some young girl forced into doing something she doesn’t like.

  52. Wow. If only finding love and finding a husband is much simpler like this. This (finding a man online) can make things easier, but would be less magical. I agree that Filipino women want to marry foreigners because of the financial stability they can offer though this is kinda embarrassing to admit.
    Just an additional tips for foreigners, I think you should look for Filipina women not living in big cities. Most of them have become outgoing and liberated. Women from countryside, rural or small cities are more modest and conservative I guess.

  53. Well, that’s an interesting and long detailed article, Kevin.
    While I’m in the US, I do find Filipino women somewhat attractive but is the effort involved really worth the effort?
    Is a young Filipino woman really that interested in an older guy? I mean are they really?

    I know the older women here in Seattle just seem to be older than their age. Maybe it’s just me wanting to be younger than what my years suggest or wanting to regain some youth that I lost due to working so damn hard in my younger years.

    What is your estimation on successful relationships between older Westerner guy with younger Filipino woman … when they use your thoughtful suggestions?

    1. Oh it sure is a marvellous and detailed post, Gary.
      Pity the majority of people that have read it are probably a little scared to comment since it is a little bit of a touchy subject i.e. Filipino girls and going after them.

      That said, there’s heaps more that Kevin could add to it, I’m sure so I hope he pops back to answer your question.

      1. I am also here out curiosity of different cultures and customs. I am 33 years old and a successful entrepreneur. Also i am well traveled and versed. @Kevin, you gained the knowledge needed and from that you have a informative blog and i respect your willingness to help inform others on your experience and procedures so they can go forth with whatever decision they shall make. Now that being said, theirs always a simple solution to any problems that arises on any country, continent, also in everyday life. I wont mention the condensending and irrational rants which two people commented earlier. It sounds like the two of you had a bad experience and Judging someone elses culture, believes, and the way the survive is why we as westerners are looked down upon by other countries. Its survival of the fittest and every country doesn’t have support like our government supports us. Both of you have at least 15 years my senior on me and it doesn’t seem like either of you have a grasp on life and the way the world works. Advice: stay in the US if the lack of empathy how other cultures survive. One last thing needs to be said. whoever wanted to trade their wife in for someone that is almost a third of your age is not a good investment nor even a good life choice since its seems your grasp on life isn’t logical at this point. Some advice for those that are sincere about finding someone compatable and has the comprehend that we go through several mental changes as we get age, what happens through the years, AND OUR CULTURE develepment of our residence is set up among other critical factors that play in our neurological development. Everyday technology and information is in the pm of your hand. Instead of passing judgement at other cultures use your phone, pc, laptop or whatever you use to bluntly VOICED IN ALL CAPS! Because your pure lack of understanding the simplest form of economics. Instead of educating yourself that is so… Easy today you put down a whole other country just because you don’t understand how and why the way things HAVE to work in the Philippines. From what you yelled earlier obviously your at a point of no resolve… listen, comprehend, understand, and even research the economic background of her home. She will think of you as a more caring and understanding and rational person. @JOE hire a private investigator for a day or two once your mind is clear that shes not playing you, you move to the next thing. It has been a few years so what os the real reason you didn’t set a time and place to meet? Maybe get your mind off just having sex with her then getting her pregnant and after that getting a DNA test and even if the kid isn’t yours you cant get divorced. Stop over thinking things and allow happiness in your mind and body then maybe get on some anti-anxiety medication. Here is my email if you would like to discuss your further options. Its been 2 years buddy. Its time to make a move if you still want to. Ide be happy to give advice and help you.
        My E-mail: [email protected]

        1. @Scott. Why bother. After a lifetime in the Engineering trades (electronics and mechanical) I have found that no amount of logical factual data will alter a highly cherished opinion. This is what makes many people incompetent at “fault fixing”. They try to make the fault fit their theory. Now. I realize that humans are very much more complex, but the process is similar.
          What most people lack is a sense of humour and curiosity, and the ability to open up to new experiences, and allow yourself to change. If I am confronted by people I have never seen before, (unless they are actively engaged in hurling sharp pointed objects at me) my reaction is always curiosity. eg. How do they live , what do they believe, what are their customs, legends, stories, etc?

          For instance: Melanesian time, drives most whiteys crazy. I imagine – even in this day and age – the circadian rhythms of village life render time a concept, rather than an imperative. Ilearned such a lot from my La Filipina, even though we only had two brief years, out of what we both thought would be a lifetime.

          As I think, W.C. Fields said: “Trust everyone, but cut the cards yourself.”

          Marum…. (El jugador de ajedrez)

        2. You lost me @ “Its survival of the fittest and every country doesn’t have support like our government supports us.”
          Our government doesn’t support me. I support my government. Other than the fine job our military does the federal government is a burden

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