tips to impress a cougar when dating

Do You Know About Dating a Cougar?

Cougars are complex, exciting, and intriguing.

Most people have no idea of what cougar dating really is.

The type of older women dating younger men, or cougars as they have come to be known, are now in vogue for being the glamorous, beautiful and often rich half of their relationships.

But there is so much more to it than that.

These women are complex, exciting, and intriguing.

That can leave men with a problem – how do you impress a woman who has seen it all before?

If you’re going to do it right, you just might need a little help from someone who knows this inside out…


Bring your ‘A’ game

Do not, I repeat, do not approach a cougar with the assumption that because she is older she is also desperate and will take whatever she can have.

Quite the opposite.

This lady doesn’t need you to feel happy – for money or for support.

She is self-sufficient and that means you need to be on top game if you want to be something she feels she needs.


Buy her dinner

Don’t assume an older woman wants to pay your half, she’s a human and not a meal ticket.

Show her you are interested in more than just her wallet by reaching for your own.

She might bat your hand away.

She might suggest going Dutch. But she won’t be put off by the fact that you have manners.

Don’t fall into the trap of assuming that from the moment you meet an older woman that you are a kept man.


Make sure you always have an opinion

If you want to be more than just another pretty face in her past, make sure you always have your own thoughts and opinions to keep conversation lively and your new lady on her toes.

It can be quite hard to keep up with cougars.

They are often very well-educated and intelligent individuals, but if you are going to be spending any time with her you need to catch her attention and show her you are on her level.

voice your own opinion
Voice your own opinion


Don’t be afraid to be strong and confident

It is not hard for an older woman to find a puppy dog that wants to follow her around and admire her.

What makes for a more rewarding and exciting partnership is if you have the guts to challenge and stand up to her.

Because she is older, independent and knows what she wants the expectation is for her to be the dominant force in the relationship, but that does not mean you have to be submissive.

Give as good as you get.


Honesty is the best policy

One thing you can guarantee a cougar has not seen a million times before is a man who is confident enough to be honest.

And by that I don’t mean telling her exactly where you’d like to stick it the first moment you see her.

Tell her what you are looking for instead, what your expectations are and see if you’re a realistic match.

Some cougars are looking for a quick hook up and some want the real thing, so get this out in the open early and you will both be getting what you want.

That’s win-win.

Let her see your true value
Let her see your true value



Some call it experience, others call it baggage, what you know for sure is that your lady had a life before you came along.

This could be mean she has had children, a divorce, anything that comes with the human experience.

Do what you can to understand her situation and how she sees you fitting into it.

Appreciate these parts of her because they are what makes her unique and beautiful.


Make life an adventure for two

If you want to turn a cougar off straightaway then the couch-potato mentality is the way to go.

Slippers ready at 7pm, kettle on, Coronation on TV?

No thank you.

Everyone loves a sofa day, but only when every other day is packed with things that make life worth living.

Try something like Y Plan if you need ideas.

Older women want adventure, fun and excitement and if you aren’t going to give it to them they will find someone else who can.


One More Cougar Thing

One last tip, remember every woman is different.

You can prepare to an extent but be ready to get to know individually for all her complexities and exactly what turns her on.


What’s Your Opinion?

  • What’s been your experience with spotting cougars in the wild?
  • As a guy, are you interested?
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Tell us your thoughts, in the comments below.

7 Tips To Impress a Cougar 1

Lucy is a keen blogger and writer

Lucy Jones – who has written posts on GeekandJock.

7 thoughts on “7 Tips To Impress a Cougar”
  1. I love cougars but you have some great point about accepting that they had lives before. So i’d like to add don’t rule her life. She knows what shes doing so let her get on with thing that maybe don’t have an effect on your relationship with her.

  2. I’ve dated a lot of older women or cougars for the sake of this post and one thing they’ve often complained about is that most younger men are intimidated. I myself have never been intimidated by age because it’s just a number. It doesn’t matter if she’s 15 or even 20 years older because I’ve seen older women act like their shoe And then I’ve seen younger women put cougars to shame with how they handle their emotions.

    Maybe there is some mystique to “going after” a cougar for the sake of the hunt, but I’ve found that they flirt just like all the other girls out there. It might be a little more subtle or even more direct, but if a man’s eyes are open and he’s interested..he shouldn’t have any trouble snaggin one ^_^

    Good luck fellas..and if you get one don’t be fooled by her bullet-proof armor..underneath she’s still plays dress up and likes boys ^_^

  3. This was an interesting article to me, because I found myself falling in love with a friend who did come to my rescue during a nasty, long divorce. He was a mutual friend of my former husband and me, and definitely wasn’t calculating by being there when my marriage of 19 years took an unexpected turn that demanded a separation, which lead to a 3 year divorce. He was genuinely a concerned, loyal, loving friend who provided a safe haven for me. I always assumed he was between 38 – 40 in his years, but learned that he actually had just turned 30 years old, oh no. I was 52 when we fell in love. Ironically, people who meet me for the first time typically believe I’m 38 or 40 years of age. My parents met my boyfriend and age doesn’t seem to be an issue, because he is extremely mature and sophisticated for his age. He also has traveled extensively around the US and abroad, so he has had a lot of exposure to other cultures and foreign languages etc. What I want to share is that I don’t think of myself as a cougar, because I never seeked to fall in love with a younger man. My brothers and friends like to tease me by exclaiming in a playful way, “Oh, you cougar!” If I’m a cougar, it is quite by default.

    1. Hey such a wonderful story you’ve shared, Val. Wow
      I think the main thing to keep in mind is the term ‘cougar’ is just a label some people attach to older women who are looking to date a younger guy.
      We totally believe in equality here and, for me, I’m simply delighted you’ve found someone to love. That’s the big winner for anyone. Age is just a number which has no bearing on complexity of falling in love.
      Have fun being teased :)
      Do you think he was more open to an older woman based on his overseas cultural exposure, if I may ask?

  4. As a cougar who married a man 9 years younger and having been together for 20 years, I would say the most important thing is to be honest. We can see through the BS from a mile away boys!

    1. While I fully agree that honesty is always the best policy when it comes to relationships, there is such a thing as being too honest, at least when initially meeting a new date.
      By that I mean it’s important to not lie but don’t go blurting out weird comments that could frighten or scare off your date when they don’t yet have the full context of your life history. Take things slow and learn about each other in small steps.
      What are your thoughts, Jen?

  5. Thanks for sharing this great article. This is the most effective way to know and learn about how to impress a cougar. These 7 tips will be very helpful and useful. I had fun reading this and many great insights here. I will share this information with my friends and they will certainly love to read this. Very informative, I’ll definitely give these 5 stars.

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