dining and food is good for a relationship

Did You Know Eating Together Can Save Your Marriage?

Any marriage is difficult, but marriage can be made even harder when partners work opposite shifts.

A successful marriage takes communication, and communication can be impossible when you only see each other in passing five days out of the week.

save a marriage and eat together
Follow along with these tips and tell us whether you do them

If you and your spouse work opposite shifts, here are five ways that you can make sure your marriage doesn’t fall by the wayside:

Take the Same Day Off

If you are at a job that allows you to bid for shifts, try to take the same days off as your spouse.

Even one shared day off can give you time to do things together that you enjoy.

If you are able to take a day off together, don’t spend it running errands or visiting family if you can help it.

Dedicate the day to the two of you and spend it doing something fun.


Eat Together

Make a deal with each other that you will eat dinner together at least one night a week.

This may mean that you need to adjust your dinner time, but it will give you an hour of uninterrupted talk time.

Turn the ringers off on your phones, keep the television off and turn the radio on.

You don’t have to have a romantic dinner by candlelight, but you do have to have a dinner where your sole focus is each other.


Meet for Lunch

dining can be simple with togetherness
Meeting up can even be as simple as a conversational coffee together.
What counts is that it’s … together

You don’t have to meet for lunch every day of the week, but a once-weekly lunch date can go a long way to establishing a line of communication.

Meet your spouse at work on his or her lunch break or meet at a favorite restaurant.

Alternatively, you can grab a couple of sandwiches on your way and meet in a nearby park.

Not only will you have a great lunch together, but your spouse will get a much-needed break from the office.


Leave Notes

Getting creative with sticky notes can be a great way to let your spouse know that you are thinking about them.

Leave sticky notes around the house for your spouse to find while you are at work, or post sticky notes on your spouse’s steering wheel, stick them in their lunch, or recruit one of your spouse’s co-workers to leave them on his or her desk for you.

Leaving sticky notes will let your spouse know that they are on your mind when you aren’t together.


Play Hookie

While it’s never advisable to abuse sick time, call off once in a while to spend the day with your spouse.

You can also use a day of camp, vacation, or holiday time if your employer offers such.

Taking the day off to spend with your spouse will make them feel special and appreciated. You don’t have to tear up the town on your day off; you can stay in bed, cuddle on the couch or even work in the yard.

Just make sure that you don’t leave the house if you call off sick; you don’t want to run the risk of getting caught.

To save your marriage takes effort, but having opposite shifts can make marriage more difficult than normal.

If you get creative with the attention that you pay to your spouse, your marriage can not only survive opposite work shifts but can thrive in the face of them.


Over To You

Now that we’ve reached the bottom, here’s what you can do next:

  • Do you actually find the time to sit down and dine with your partner?
  • Do you make other times to share a meal with them?
  • What are other ways to enjoy your partner, involving food?
  • Click a Share button – your friends can then enjoy this article too.

How Eating Together Can Save Your Marriage 1

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12 thoughts on “How Eating Together Can Save Your Marriage”
  1. It’s all about quality time my friend – great tips and a meal in itself should be taken in as an enjoyment and pleasure to nourish our bodies and if you can share it with someone even better!

    Take care my friends,

    1. True Nancy. There are meals and then there are meals.
      The article makes a lot of sense when you think about how you feel eating alone as opposed to feeling when you’re sharing a meal with another. It’s just so so much more enjoyable and connecting.
      Apply that to a partner and family and you get the benefit.

  2. Hi Rachel, me and my husbands eat all of our meal together and I never thought that it could be important for our relationship. Thank you for pointing this out to us.
    We also enjoy cooking together, it’s really fun.

    1. There is something extra special in the actual cooking together, isn’t there Mariella?
      What’s the dish you most love cooking together?

    2. Growing up my family always ate together and I really feel like that helps kids and parents touch base after being apart all day. That’s something I’ve made very important in my family today. We eat dinner together nearly every night with no TV or cell phones interrupting.
      As far as cooking together, that doesn’t work for us. I’m a very controlling cook and won’t let anyone into the kitchen. Except the dog. He eats what I drop so I don’t have to sweep :)

      1. Controlling huh, Regan – well, there’s something for you to work on :)

        Pam and I used to get into all sorts of serious meltdowns (and not the cooking kind either) when we were both in the kitchen together. We’ve since learned each other’s triggers and now we’re pretty good at the dinner teamwork.

        Would you like your partner to help, Regan, as in enjoy it together?

  3. Quality time together… it sounds so simple really! I’m often surprised by the lack of quality time couples spend together. It seems that our busy lifestyles are making it harder and harder for us to communicate and build a sense of community.

    There’s a group of psychologists out of the UK, who suggested a theory of “Human Givens” (similar to Maslow’s hierarchy of needs). In short, they claim that there are a bunch of “givens” that humans require in order to be happy and healthy… and one of them is a sense of belonging (to a relationship, to a family, to a community).

    The theory goes on to suggest that if any of these “givens” are not met, then there is a high probability of the person suffering from mental health conditions. I wonder then if the increase in mental illness is a direct correlation to the lack of belonging that many people feel.


    1. Ahh, yes, a person’s Value System affects everything we do in life, doesn’t it, David?

      I remember when I did a Dr John DeMartini weekend course 5 years ago that the Value System was so ingrained and vital to understand. That said, aligning as well as adjusting you own values can be easily done once you understand why you do something and why it might not serve you.

      So wrap that around the reasons why the simple act of eating together is so important and you get a pattern interrupt to steer your course in chewing on that stew with your family :)

  4. Great article!
    I love the part about turning off the radio, phones and television. it’s amazing how much space they take up in one’s attention span…even if it’s only in the background.

    Although our kitchen is a bit tight for the both of us to cook at the same time, my husband and I usually wash the dishes together. It feels like teamwork and I appreciate that :)

    1. Ha, you guys sound like us, Dana :)
      We’ve got the usually ‘assigned’ kitchen tasks and it always helps when you get some teamwork going – like I’m doing the Stir Fry preparation and Pam will prep the noodles for me.

      Thankfully we try and defer all technology to OFF during together time too.
      And thanks for your wonderful sharing.

  5. True! If we talk about teens, they are often seen sipping sodas and eating burgers at schools! But they’re absolutely right in a way because if they go in a posh restaurant, they’ll probably be stared at by everyone :D

    1. Hey Raaj, my friend.
      The main thing is that they’re doing right though. There isn’t too many other activities that envelope humans better than ‘breaking bread together’. It’s the mix of all our senses that seems to be the trick.

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